Trees Archives - Page 10 of 11

Build It And They Might Come – Tourism And The Fate Of UTG

Aberdeen City, Articles, Environment, Featured, Information, News, Opinion No Responses »

Jan 062012

Over three years ago, Sir Ian Wood announced the City Square Project with the intention of replacing Union Terrace Gardens with “a cross between the Grand Italian Piazza and a mini Central Park.” It has since been renamed the City Garden Project. The cost of building the project is nominally £140 million, of which it has been proposed that £70M of this would be borrowed by Aberdeen City Council involving a tax scheme. Mike Shepherd offers some analysis of current local government trends, the recession, and what it may mean for Aberdeen.

So what is the justification being put forward for this expensive project, a project that has caused so much controversy since it was announced?

The project’s supporters allege the City Garden Project is needed to ensure that Aberdeen is attractive enough to retain energy professionals long term and to ensure Aberdeen’s economy is based on tourism post-oil.

For instance, an advert by ACSEF in the Press and Journal (January 2010) stated that:-

“Creating a new heart for Aberdeen presents a unique opportunity to put the city on the ‘must visit’ list.”

Aberdeen City Council is £562 million in debt (2010 figure).
See: http://www.scotland.gov.uk/Publications/2011/02/21143624/4

Last November, Perth and Kinross Council approved demolishing the listed Perth Town Hall to build a Civic Square in its place, a move that has raised much controversy. The BBC reported:

“The council said many local businesses supported the civic square proposal. And council officers have argued that full demolition and reuse of the site as a public space would provide the most additional value to the local economy. The cost of scheme is estimated at £4.4m, but the report said an additional 15,000 people per year would extend their stay in the city, with an extra 60,000 coming for events. “This would result in a combined additional spend per person per visit of £23 generating a total gross expenditure of £1.65m per annum,” it added.
See:http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-tayside-central-15742937

Perth and Kinross Council is £222 Million in debt (2010 figure).

A similar controversy has been raging in Cork, Ireland, where the struggling Cork Council has been involved in a plan to install the Sky Garden Project. Celebrity TV gardener Diarmuid Gavin’s Irish Sky Garden won the gold medal at the Chelsea Flower Show (It looks like a giant hanging flower basket).

There is a pattern here. Local governments the world over are in serious debt

The Council agreed to put the garden on permanent display in the city’s Fitzgerald Park at a cost of at least €300,000, with more than €1.7 million given to the project by Fáilte Ireland, the Irish tourism body.

In tones, redolent of the Aberdeen controversy, the Irish Independent wrote:

“THE taxpayer could be hit with a further bill of over €100,000 in costs connected to Diarmuid Gavin’s award-winning garden.

“Workers’ Party councillor Ted Tynan said the council needed to clarify precisely how much the garden cost, and what the council would pay in transport, insurance and operating costs. He also expressed disbelief that the garden — including its 30-metre high floating ‘pod’ and crane — may only open for three months each year.

“I love gardens and flowers and parks, but this is absolutely ridiculous. You’d put a hell of a lot of flower beds around the city for this kind of money. We should keep our feet on the ground not in the clouds with a sky garden’,” Mr Tynan said

“There are 500 boarded-up council houses in Cork and 120 people with various disabilities waiting on home adaptations. But the funding to go to all this has been cut by central government,” he added.

“Last night, the council said support for the “iconic garden” was in line with the policy that led to the creation of successful visitor attractions in the city.”

“This is part of a long-term policy to create a necklace of top tourist attractions that will bring people to Cork, get them to stay longer here and spend more money here,” a council spokesman said.

“Fáilte Ireland insisted that the garden would generate significant tourism earnings.”

See: http://www.independent.ie/national-news/diarmuid-gavinrsquos-euro2m-lsquosky-gardenrsquo-growing-in-cost-2661548.html

There is a pattern here. Local governments the world over are in serious debt. Services and amenities are being cut, yet it doesn’t stop them from spending money on expensive big-ticket items that might bring visitors in. There is a feedback loop between local government, chambers of commerce and national government that serves to create the syndrome, “if we build it, they will come”.

While a worthy cause, this has caused controversy as the annual budget will be part-funded by the city’s Common Good Fund

Where local economies have failed as in Cork for example, tourism may be the last throw of the dice to engender outside income. There will be much competition for the dwindling number of international tourists as the recession bites. Recent reports suggest that countries such as Greece and Spain will focus relentlessly on promoting tourism as the last glimmer of light in their busted economies.

Aberdeen has caught up on the trend of pushing long-term tourism. The local chamber of commerce have been promoting a new destination marketing organisation for the city called ‘Visit Aberdeen’.

While a worthy cause, this has caused controversy as the annual budget will be part-funded by the city’s Common Good Fund; £107,000 for 2011 / 2012 and potentially for the next six years also. Arguably this is more ‘commerce good’ than ‘common good’.

The draft business plan recognises the future of the City Garden Project / Union Terrace Gardens as a primary issue. It is to be hoped that an organisation part-funded by Common Good money will not be promoting the controversial development of a public park that lies on Common Good land.
See: http://committees.aberdeencity.gov.uk/mgConvert2PDF.aspx?ID=15678

Are the citizens of Aberdeen willing to support the allocation of scarce resources to “a build it and they might come” vision for the city, allowing a public park to be developed for the sake of possible future tourists? Or is this all pie in the sky stuff that will use up money desperately needed elsewhere and will result in the appearance of the Granite City changing forever?

You have the chance to decide yourself. The referendum on the fate of Union Terrace Gardens will be held in February.

Union Treeless Gardens

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Featured, Information, Opinion No Responses »

Dec 292011

By Mike Shepherd.

The jury for the City Garden Project will announce the final scheme for the proposed development of Union Terrace Gardens sometime in January. The choice will be between two designs, one with a web-based motif and the other with a big glass building in the middle which looks like a giant worm.

It is clear from both designs that most of the existing trees will be removed to build the new ‘garden’, whichever is built.

New trees could of course be planted, but it would be decades before these grew to a comparable size, and this may not even be possible in those areas with a shallow concrete substrate. There will be claims that some of the smaller trees could be replanted, although the practicalities of this are obvious.

The big trees are particularly important as they absorb carbon and filter more pollution from the air compared to smaller trees. One study concluded that for this purpose:

“Big trees, the ones the Victorians planted for us, are what we need to maintain, but they are few and far between.”
See: http://www.theecologist.org

This week saw the shocking news that people living in Scottish cities are being exposed to dangerously high levels of pollutants. A WWF Scotland report identified three pollution hotspots in Aberdeen; Union Street, Market Street, and Wellington Road. These show levels that are in breach of EU targets intended to protect human health. The main problem is the high levels of nitrogen dioxide caused by traffic fumes.
See: http://www.pressandjournal.co.uk

Aberdeen has a highly-polluted city centre. The solution to the problem would be to reduce the level of traffic in the city centre; pedestrianising Union Street has been suggested as an option.

It is also clear that we need to maintain the tree population of the city centre to help absorb the pollution. The key areas are Bon Accord Gardens, St. Nicholas churchyard and Union Terrace Gardens itself. Otherwise, Aberdeen city centre can hardly be described as awash with trees.

Yet, the proposed City Garden Project will remove a population of mature trees from the city centre. The problem is acknowledged in the Technical Feasibility Study for the project.

“Removal of mature trees and existing ecological habitat; 78 mature trees would be lost including 17 number mature Elm trees. The ecological value of these trees would take decades to replace as many of the trees are up to 200 years old.”

The City Garden Project will itself be a major source of pollution while it is being built (for the duration of almost two and a half years according to the same study).

“Excavation of rock/earth; It is anticipated that 30,000m3 of earth and 35,000m3 of granite will need to be removed from site. This which will cause large environmental impacts from noise, dust, transport and energy use. The removal of this volume of material is equivalent to approximately 3,947 dump trucks of earth and 4,605 dump trucks or more of granite to be removed from site or re-used where possible on site. This would have large environmental and social impacts on the local area and community surrounding the gardens.”
See: http://www.acsef.co.uk

It is clear from this, that the ecological downside of building the City Garden Project is substantial. The construction phase will see a protracted period of dirt and pollution in the city centre. By contrast, it is no exaggeration to describe Union Terrace Gardens as the green, living heart of the Granite City; its big trees acting as a natural washing machine, helping to keep us healthy by removing noxious pollution.

Those living in Aberdeen City will receive a postal ballot in mid February allowing them to decide between retaining Union Terrace Gardens or sanctioning the construction of the City Garden Project.

I will vote to retain Union Terrace Gardens.

Old Susannah No.59 – No Country For Old Men

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Creative Writing, Information, Opinion, Satire and Humour No Responses »

Nov 252011

Voice’s Old Susannah takes a look at the week that was in Aberdeen and beyond and concludes that this is no country for old men (nor for old women, people with special abilities, school children and infants or animals either).

Old Susannah has been busy this past week. There was an excellent two-day conference at Fyvie Castle. The speakers seemed to believe our heritage, buildings, archaeology and environment are being affected by something they called ‘climate change’. Hard to believe, but some of these speakers think that our weather and climate are changing.

I’ve no idea why they would come to such a conclusion. There was some person from the Met Office (whatever that is), who seems to think a case can be made for climate change because he has statistics that show it’s happening now.

Stranger still, he thinks this climate change might be somehow linked to people burning lots of ‘fossil fuel’. If anyone hears any news about this unlikely story, please let me know.

The general thrust of the conference was that our ancient buildings are under moisture and temperature stresses they’ve not faced before, and many are at risk of actually crumbling. Something called ‘Skara Brae’ in the Orkneys might get washed out to sea before long.

This would not be a huge loss. As far as I can see, it just a bunch of old stones. The site is crying out for a nice high rise building, holiday homes, shops and parking – if not a monolith and a giant glass worm. As to our wildlife, seasons are getting wetter and warmer, affecting growth and breeding cycles. This is no time to be a bird of prey (or any other type of wild creature either. Just don’t mention deer).

Despite the fact these animals are protected, we still have people who poison, shoot, and loot eggs. Mixed with the changing seasons and related change in availability of food, things look rather bad for these creatures.

This two-day course was run at Fyvie Castle by the Scottish Traditional Building Skills Centre, an organisation which trains people (of all abilities) in the skills needed to maintain our historic built heritage. The Traditional Skills people seem to think preserving Scotland’s historic buildings and monuments is a worthwhile thing to do. (If certain local developers have their way, this centre won’t be needed much longer).

Further information is available on their website:
http://www.traditionalskills.com/

We must have skilled craftspeople in future who can ensure the glass worm/teletubbieland, concrete ramps, etc. will remain beautiful, as I’m sure they will be when they are built.

I couldn’t help going away from the conference thinking what I’d do if I had £50 million burning a hole in my pocket. It might involve a little bit of BrewDog, but it would not involve getting rid of listed trees to build a carpark with decorative worm.

It would have been very hard for staff to figure out that this frail woman had a wound so deep you could see her bone

I was glad of the two-day course and its speakers, if for no other reason than there’s not much else going on in the wider world for me to write about this week. I think I heard something about an American policeman offering some protesters a peppery snack treat, and there may be one or two minor problems in Europe and the Middle East.

I also get the feeling that there might be some financial issues concerning our European economic paradise. Other than that, I’ve not much to say just now.

Close to home, news these past few weeks has been short on happy endings. For one thing, the Monolith was not shortlisted as a Union Terrace Garden design. But looking through recent news items, I conclude this is no country for old men. Or old women, women, people with special abilities, school children and infants. And this is definitely no country for animals.

For example take the case of 87 year-old Jamesina Mackenzie who died from a bedsore which became so exposed you could see the bone. This didn’t happen in the ‘dark’ or middle ages; it’s just happened.

So let’s move on to a definition or two.

Bedsore: (compound noun, English) A type of pressure sore caused by the sufferer lying prone in one position without movement over time. A wholly avoidable type of ailment.

The owner of the Highland ‘care home’ where Ms Mackenzie suffered with the sore that killed her told an inquiry into the death that his staff ‘did the best they could’. According to this manager, the problem was that ‘…there had been some errors in staff’s record keeping’. What would have been the result if they were negligent or slacked off, Old Susannah wonders.

I was glad to hear the staff did the best they could. After all, paperwork can be pretty heavy going. It would have been very hard for staff to figure out that this frail woman, who must have been in excruciating pain, had a wound so deep you could see her bone. You would have to have some kind of medical background to work that out.

Older people are always happy to sell up their own homes

My granny had been head nurse of a hospital in Massachusetts. The old-fashioned, primitive way to prevent bedsores was to encourage movement and if necessary, actually help people to move.

This hospital was very inefficient in that it had more nurses and doctors than managers. Far too much money was spent on patients’ food, and far too much time was spent on actually caring for people. I’ll bet the place didn’t even have a good profit margin.

Care Home: (compound noun, English) a residential institution dedicated to long-term care offering rest and re-cooperation of infirm people, usually elderly.

‘Care home’ – the word even sounds warm, safe and snug. The problem is running these homes costs money which could be put to other use. Older people are always happy to sell up their own homes so they will be able to afford a care home of the type which looked after Ms Mackenzie so well.

Saving money and keeping a home in order to have something to leave to your children is so passe. Sure you might get one or two dozen stories a month about older, frail people being abused in care homes, but who are you going to believe – them and their relatives, or the highly-paid (sorry – highly-trained) caring staff who run these places for profit.

Since most regional authorities and councils decided to ‘outsource’ their care responsibilities, there may have been a few minor hiccups or injuries and deaths. But outsourcing is here to stay.

Still our City council knows best, and despite the collapse of a major private care home operator, Aberdeen is still looking into privatising more of its homes. Which leads me to a definition I might have already done, but seems to need updating.

Outsourcing: (noun; modern English) To take a service or operation away from its parent/owner and have it run by a third party.

We are desperate to save money in Aberdeen (those portraits and jeans for the Lord Provost don’t pay for themselves, you know) and in order to do so, we are giving our money to consultants. The totally impartial consultants come in and look at your business. They decide which services should be outsourced, and then the money saving starts instantly.

clearly they just want to give the best care possible to your grandparents or children.

Coincidentally, they often want to outsource the same services that they are able to provide. Old Susannah has yet to hear of a consultancy saying ‘let’s hire more people so we can run things better and have nicer schools and care homes’.

This just proves that the consultancies are impartial businesses which have to make tough choices. It must be very hard for them indeed.

After the consultants have been paid a modest sum for their expertise, the city fires/lets go/lays off its existing staff who initially performed the services. That’s a saving right there in salary expense. In the case of childcare or nursing homes, this may upset the clients initially (the word ‘client’ as used by the City is an old, infirm or young human being to the rest of us).

The ‘clients’ may lose any relationship they’ve built up with their previous carers, but never mind. If you play your cards right, you might even fire enough people to pay part of the consultant’s bill.

The economics of outsourcing get greater for the city involved. Now that they are no longer providing a non-profit service with taxpayer money, they turn the taxpayer money over to people who exist to make a profit. It might seem as if these private operators would cut a corner or two to make money, but clearly they just want to give the best care possible to your grandparents or children.

In the old days you might have thought the purpose of paying tax was so that the government could provide you the services you needed, but which were not designed to be money-making businesses. If we read the odd case of an older person abused (or given a salt shaker instead of an asthma inhaler as happened recently), then that’s the breaks. The other breaks often involve bones.

Thankfully in these modern, enlightened times, we realise that making money is more important than anything else. Including poor Mrs Mackenzie and the other stories that don’t make the paper.

Stop Press! Aberdeen City Council has approved its budget! Read all about it here in this unbiased City Council report:
http://www.aberdeencity.gov.uk/CouncilNews/ci_cns/pr_budgetrevcap_100211.asp

It’s all central government’s fault for not giving us lots more dosh. This might be in part because we waste so much of the stuff on monolith research, portraits and so on, but hey. You will I’m sure be happy to know that only a few hundred posts will either go unfilled (keeps the existing staff busy covering lots of jobs – they enjoy it) or will go altogether.

Re-roofing an unfit building makes as much sense as anything else going on here

We’re holding on to teaching assistants, which is interesting because we’ll be cutting expensive, boring music and art lessons for children. If you don’t have time to visit the city’s website, then just rest assured of one thing: the 50 metre swimming pool is still very much in the cards. Result!

We may pay for it from the Common Good Fund (remember the good old days when this was c. £35 million? Things have changed). To help balance the books, it looks as if Tullos Swimming Pool will stay shut.

Old Susannah is told that it recently had brand new lights installed, and its roof is brand new. Which is odd, because the city now say the building is unstable. Re-roofing an unfit building makes as much sense as anything else going on here.

Consultants have also produced a brilliant 10 page report (took about a year to do, as you can imagine), showing that Aberdeen has many more swimming pools per population than other parts of Scotland. Of course these consultants counted in all the pools we’ve got: Ardoe, Palm Court, etc. etc. I guess the families of Torry will just have to hop into their BMWs and pay to swim for a day at a hotel pool once Tullos is gone.

Still, we’ll have saved money, and we may eventually produce a swimmer who may win a shiny medal. If Aberdeen wins an Olympic medal in a few decades, we’ll all agree it’s been worth it.

A Meadow-Sweet Experience

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Creative Writing, Environment, Information, Opinion, Satire and Humour No Responses »

Nov 172011

By Bob Smith.

A meadow ower on Tullos Hill
Iss idea it is maist gran
A use faar mair diversified
Than jist trees upon the lan

A maun confess a love fer trees
Am a member o The Widdland Trust
Bit the growin o a hey meadow
Ower in Tullos iss is a must

Ye’ll hae wild flooers an ither plants
Buttercups, reid clover an daisies
Ti attract aa kins o beasties
Moths plus bees an butterflees

Doonamang aa the grasses
Frog hoppers wi yon cuckoo spit
Horny-gollachs an grasshoppers
An beetles faa feed on shit

Hay meadows are rich in earthwirms
Faa dee gweed things ti the soil
Are fine grub fer birds an mowdiewarts
A feast they think richt royal

Noo meadows provide nesting grun
Fer the peesies an skylarks
Faa hiv a job ti survive
In intensive fairmed parks

It’s reckoned ae hail acre
Can support twa million spiders
An lots o ither insects
Faa in win are expert gliders

Anither species faa wull benefit
Fae iss idea fit’s maist gifted
Is aa us tired oot humans
Faas spirits wull be uplifted

Jist ti waak throwe a meadow
Wi its flooers an bummin foggies
A pleasure e’en on a frosty morn
Myn an weer yer hummel doddies

So awa wi yon feel ideas
Ti sheet the puir bliddy deer
Leave them ti graze a meadow
An live a life withoot ony fear

©Bob Smith”The Poetry Mannie” 2011
Image credit: Suzanne Kelly.

A Union Terrace Gardens Autumn

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Environment, Information, Opinion No Responses »

Nov 072011

A Photoessay by Earl Solomon and Suzanne Kelly

Autumn is surely one of the best times to experience Union Terrace Gardens.

The leaves are changing colour; the air is cool but very clean (that’s what trees do), and in this unique valley garden people are enjoying themselves.

We spoke to Gaye who had been cleaning up rubbish on the morning of the 29th October. She had been down earlier with a group of school children who had planted bulbs.

The variety of plants and flowers in bloom even at this late stage of the year is an impressive draw to many, and we were far from the only photographers there Saturday.

Many were Scottish; some were Dutch tourists.

We looked at a tree we both particularly like – the ‘Friendship Tree’. This is a Madagascar Cedar, known there as The Tree of the Gods.

It was a gift to Aberdeen in the 1970s by the Indian High Commission, and the then Provost, James Wyness, attended a planting ceremony with His Excellency the Ambassador.

It has delicate, long needles and is a very attractive tree, although it seems to have had its top badly pruned (or perhaps it was an unfortunate accident during a storm).

It is a nice addition to the other ancient, listed trees.

How very different the garden was on the night of 1st November.

It was the scene for the Pumpkin Parade.

Dozens of carved jack o’lanterns were lit up and gave the park a very atmospheric Halloween feeling.

Many children were present, and spent a happy hour or so running around on the grass.

This park is perfect for this city. It is its city centre lungs; it is the city’s green heart and it doesn’t need a heart operation. It needs to be better manicured and for its animals and flora to be respected.

And that is all it needs.

OS No. 55 – At A Loss For Worlds

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Creative Writing, Information, Opinion, Satire and Humour No Responses »

Oct 212011

Old Susannah looks back over a week in Aberdeen which felt like a month whizzing by in a day and wonders how much of it was real, and how much more connectivity she can make sense of.

The past week in the Granite City was as vibrant and dynamic as you could have hoped for. There were walks and photos on Tullos Hill, and photos taken on Belmont Street, to the outrage of security guards.

The opening of the exhibition at the Pier (that’s one of the empty shops at the Academy shopping centre in case you didn’t know) for the six design finalists was of course the pinnacle of everyone’s week if not existence.

On the VIP ONLY opening day, an entire 5 people showed up before 9am to marvel at the designs.

These were our very own Lord Provost, Jennifer Craw, Aileen ‘Ho’Malone, Kate Dean, and a charming blonde woman with clipboard, supposed by many to be Zoe Corsi from the BIG Partnership.

It was as if all my Halloweens had come at once.

She saw me about to take a photo (yes, I fully admit I was going to take a picture, it is a fair cop) and came out of the building to tell me photos weren’t allowed. Laughingly I told her that I was on a public street. To teach me a good lesson I shan’t soon forget, she said ‘OK then’ and obligingly struck a pose. I feel obliged to reproduce it here, along with the picture that Security initially banned.

Look away now if you are of a sensitive disposition. It all becomes clear why they were so keen to stop me.

There are six finalists. The competition was very, very stiff (so stiff I suspect rigor mortis had set in), and there were many good submissions.

But there can be only six. Choosing these finalists was very difficult, and a bit of an agonising process as well, I don’t mind admitting. And I put my hand up – there is no way I could do a better job than any of these finalists; and probably could not have done as well as they did either.

All are to be congratulated for getting this far, and I mean that sincerely.

Without further ado here are the six finalists – for the best reviews of the preposterous, ridiculous, unworkable, ugly, childish, regressive, anti-elegant pieces of tripe which were shortlisted to destroy Union Terrace Gardens.

1. The Monolith

A beautiful and concise summary of the design which looks like a game of Jenga played badly at 3am. Nothing to do with Aberdeen. Even less to do with the garden. Everything to do with’ 2001: A Space Odyssey’. In the words of those on Facebook (which all the young people use for ‘connectivity’ and so on), the Monolith design is something ‘we can worship at the foot of’.

The supporters of Monolith are 30 strong, at the time of writing, the Official City Garden Project Exhibition Facebook site has 68 members. Yes, that’s right: the ‘silent majority’ who want the gardens built on have come out in full force. Please do visit the Monolith Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/VOTEMONOLITH?sk=wall for a full set of photos, and some colourful prose.

2. The Alternative City Gardens Design Contest

The artwork here is superior to anything you will see in the Pier. The people who created this page understand design principles, scale, colour and aesthetics to a degree our shortlisted official designers can only dream of. There are pterodactyls, sunken Statue of Liberties, giant slides, flying saucers and other elements worthy of your attention. The designs I see on this page are as affordable, attainable and desirable as anything you will find in the Pier. Please register your approval at:

https://www.facebook.com/VOTEMONOLITH?sk=wall#!/pages/Alternative-City-Gardens-Design-Contest/251979328187602 At present this worthy effort has 40 people who like it. Do scroll all the way down, or you might miss the ‘Colossus of Woods’. Beautiful and stirring. And I do like stirring.

3. TeletubbyLand

I nearly spat out my Tubby ‘ustard and Tubby toast when I came across this entry, immediately shortlisted as one of the six finalists.

Yes, someone has gone back to the set of the Teletubbies and re-created all those walkways. I see no potential problems with concrete walkways ascending and descending some 50 feet or better above the gardens. No one will fall, jump, slip or be pushed; they will be great for bobsled practice in the winter, and police will be able to respond to any crime on the ground in seconds.

If we covered these great concrete slabs with something to stop anyone throwing empty beer cans at those below, then we’d have a giant cage. Result! A Facebook poster has revealed that Tinky Winky is the mysterious £5 million pound donor towards the garden project going ahead. To this particular vision of our future, just say ‘Po.’

I only hope there will be a chance in all of this for me to attend an event where the designer(s) of Teletubbyland have to explain to a room full of grown-ups just what they were thinking.

Oh, and as reminder, for the shortlisted designers, a prize is awarded of somewhere in the region of £135,000. £135,000 for a drawing of the set of a kids’ tv show or a monolith. I must go find a definition of either ‘value for money’ or ‘old rope.’ Dipsy would be proud.

4. The Giant Glass Worm on ‘The Future Is Here’

We aren’t supposed to reveal who any of these creative masterminds are, but when you visit this website – which is a must – you will soon realise that No. 4 and No. 5 of my shortlist are both by this design giant. His observation of the glass structure proposed somehow to cover pedestrians, cars and trains may be one of the worthiest submissions yet:

“The worm doesn’t actually devour the humans, It appears to simply wine and dine them. Like a giant larval bad date” – Fraser Denholm

Obviously there won’t be any issues with air quality, safety, cleanliness (or just plain stupidity) if we make a giant glass worm cover people, trains and cars. Will smell lovely inside I’m certain. Birds will persuaded not to deface the beautiful worm by either defecating on it or crashing into it. Likewise vandals would never be tempted to do anything to a giant glass structure covering a road or train track. Why didn’t we think of this sooner?

Hats off to you Mr Denholm. A job at Foster & Partner surely awaits.

The best part of the serious submission is some giant banners in the worm’s body which for no particular reason read ‘science’ on them. These will soon be for sale as tea towels in every city centre souvenir shop which this project will deliver.
http://fraserdenholm.blogspot.com/2011/10/future-is-here.html

5. ‘I can’t believe it’s not Halliday Fraser Munro!’ (the underground bunker with no ventilation and with trees without roots growing on top of it).

Mr Denholm delivers some spectacular laughs, but we do have only six places on the shortlist. His prose is brief on this lovely design, but is incisive.

This design gives us all the underground lifestyle we can only dream of – no sun, no natural light, and not even any air vents of note, for if they were included, they would be very large and visible in the garden. The garden features giant trees which very thoughtfully don’t need to have any roots. Most plants have underground parts that are at least as large as their ‘aerial’ parts. Not these ones.

Four-hundred-year-old trees are so yesterday.

Get rid of those, the things living in them, and get some of these magic, rootless trees. Denholm also correctly identifies the rice paddies (they can’t be anything but) which grace another shortlisted design.

With all this connectivity business, I’m starting to wonder whether all these people pushing the project forward are in some way ‘connected.’ Maybe even well connected.

6. The Garden of Earthly Delights (H Bosch)

Normally in an important competition, it would be wrong to include yourself, friends or family members, but this is my late-breaking entry for the competition. It’s not as if there are any family ties between the official competition companies, entities, sponsors, backers and so on.

Feel free to vote for my design, which is also on the Alternative Garden Project site.

I think it nicely captures the place where the garden scheme movers and shakers are heading. And it’s got a space for musical performances, and access at all sides.

When you do visit the Pier, pay attention to all the lovely drawings. See the trees that cannot exist if something is built under them. See the lovely people walking around casually, just like you’ll be doing in February.

See the complete absence of logic. If Star Trek’s Mr Spock were real and went to this show, he’d have a breakdown. Comfort yourself with the fact there are several good pubs nearby. You will need one.

And there you have it. I have sadly taken up so much space with the finalists that there is only room for one definition. For some reason this sprang to mind.

Boycott

(noun, verb – modern English) to embargo, ban or cease trade or activities with a person, company or entity.

Folks – has someone or some company taken advantage of your good nature for too long? Is, say, a football mogul asking you to ultimately pay (via an ‘uplift’ in retail tax) to turn your Victorian garden into Teletubby land? Has such a person sent letters to the press ‘warning’ that unless we build a monolith or worm, the city is going to fail? Has a certain chemist likewise said that a concrete spider web will save us and we must all stick to it? Has a certain councillor said that you need to support a monolith and monorail? Has a hotelier called you a luddite NIMBY for not wanting a big bunker in er, your backyard?

Whatever can you do about it?

Well, if you wanted, you could boycott these and other like-minded businesses and business people. Don’t shop with them. Don’t use their premises. Don’t for the love of Pete vote for them. Don’t spend your hard-earned money to watch their football team lose, and don’t (for many reasons) buy a house from them.

If everyone were to boycott people who used their power in ways the public did not wish, then things would change. And not into a giant worm either.

Next week: who knows?

Reminders:
1. Please keep your artwork coming for the Union Terrace Gardens art contest, which (because of lots of stuff) has not closed yet. Alternative designs for the garden project most welcome.
2. Anti-deer cull postcards still available – get in touch if you need some; I know where they can be found.

Why Union Terrace Gardens Really Matters

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Environment, Featured, Information, Opinion No Responses »

Oct 132011

Mike Shepherd, Chairman of the Friends of Union Terrace Gardens, puts the case for keeping Union Terrace Gardens.

Union Terrace Gardens are a vital part of Aberdeen’s heritage.

The city centre park was planned by Alexander Marshall Mackenzie, the architect who also designed the Art Gallery, St Marks and the frontage of Marischal College.

If Union Terrace Gardens feel as if they belong in the city, it is because there is a harmony between the park and the surrounding buildings, several of which were designed by Marshall Mackenzie.

There is a sense of architectural authenticity. This authenticity would be lost if a six-acre modern square is built, which would be surrounded by Victorian granite buildings. The singer Annie Lennox has described this possibility as an act of civic vandalism.

Aberdeen’s heritage matters.

The beautiful granite buildings give us a sense of place and belonging. We identify with our heritage, and Aberdonians are proud of their beautiful city. The replacement of the old with the new, artlessly done, erodes the unique feel of Aberdeen, and starts to make our city look like everywhere else.

The Gardens are beautiful and spectacular.

The Gardens provide shelter below street level under the hustle and bustle of the city centre. The shelter is enhanced by the 78 mature trees in the Gardens, all of which will be chopped down if a modern city square is to be built according to the technical feasibility study.

An Aberdeen Council document states the following:

Union Terrace Gardens has many qualities to be exploited and enhanced including:

– Topography which provides a unique and dramatic setting for the surrounding historic townscape and bridges, and an essential component of the identity of the City Centre

– The character of buildings to the rear of Belmont Street

– The setting for His Majesty’s Theatre, St Mark’s and the Central Library, Denburn Viaduct and Union Bridge

– Green space and mature trees

– One of the last locations where the historic relationship of Union Street to the old city can be appreciated

(Source: Aberdeen City Council, “Aberdeen City Centre – Developing a Vision for the Future“, May 2010).

The development of Union Terrace Gardens is not a done deal.

There are many obstacles in the way of the so-called City Garden Project, such that it is unlikely to happen. The project depends on the Council borrowing £70M to fund the project through Tax Incremental Financing. The council, who are £562M in debt, cannot afford to take any more risks on borrowing.

There is no public consensus for the project: indeed a consultation held two years ago rejected the scheme. The politicians are hoping to address these concerns by holding a referendum, which will inevitably support the retention of the existing Gardens.

There is a much better alternative to building a modern and intrusive city square in the middle of the Granite City.

The Friends of Union Terrace Gardens group are committed to the sympathetic restoration of our city centre park. We intend to act in a similar capacity to the Friends of Duthie Park; Duthie park will benefit from the funds attracted by the Friends and will be restored to its former glory. Likewise, the Friends of Union Terrace Gardens intend to return Union Terrace Gardens to a fully-functioning park again.

It wouldn’t take much.

Our park needs some tender loving care, new toilets, a play pen, improved access. We have organised social events in the Gardens and we are instrumental in making Union Terrace Gardens a fun place to visit. It is a park that is a key part of Aberdeen’s heritage, the green heart of the Granite City.

We are a community group dedicated to the future of Union Terrace Gardens.

– Join us, help us in our aims; find out more from our website www.friendsofutg.co.uk

Friends Of Union Terrace Gardens Annual General Meeting

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Environment, Featured, Information, News, Opinion No Responses »

Oct 072011

The Annual General Meeting of the Friends of Union Terrace Gardens was held at the Aberdeen Arts Centre on Saturday 1^st October with over a hundred members present. FoUTG Chairman Mike Shepherd reports.

The Friends group was set up last years with the aim of campaigning to save the gardens from development and currently has over 700 members.

Two major decisions were approved by the members present.
The Friends now fully support the idea of the proposed referendum currently being investigated by Aberdeen Council.

The suggested referendum would be a vote between a final design for the City Garden Project and a sympathetically restored Union Terrace Gardens.

The group is totally confident of winning any referendum.

The Friends also reaffirmed the aim of taking over the stewardship of Union Terrace Gardens once the City Garden Project is out of the way. We would act in a similar role as the Friends of Duthie Park, who have been very successful in getting funds to restore the Victorian park. Providing toilets, easier access and a play park were some of the options discussed at the meeting.

This was a very positive meeting, and the members are confident that we will save the park. The design competition is not seen as a serious threat, as we trust our fellow citizens to recognise the stupidity of building a modern city square in the middle of a city full of old and beautiful granite buildings.

When we discussed the referendum, the shout was ‘bring it on, we will win.’ The enthusiasm and determination to win through and to restore of our much-loved gardens as a fully-functioning
park was evident.

We are a group that cares deeply about Aberdeen’s wonderful heritage and a community-led force for the greater good of our beautiful city.

Something’s A Myth In The City Square

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Environment, Featured, Information, Opinion No Responses »

Sep 302011

By Mike Shepherd.

A document has appeared purporting to reveal and counter ‘myths’ about the proposed Union Terrace Gardens development. It has been posted on the Aberdeen and Grampian Chamber of Commerce (AGCC) website.
Some of the claims are disingenuous and others stretch the idea of a ‘myth’ somewhat.

AGCC: “Fiction: This is Sir Ian Wood’s project. Fact: The City Garden is not and never has been Sir Ian Wood’s project.”

The City Square has always been seen as Sir Ian Wood’s project. Sir Ian announced his proposal at HM Theatre in November 2008. The Evening Express reported the launch with the headline;

“Options revealed in Sir Ian Wood’s vision for Union Terrace Gardens” EE13/11/08

The same article also states:

“The businessman wants to raise Aberdeen’s Union Terrace Gardens to street level and create a civic square.”

A media quote picked at random clearly shows that it has invariably been perceived as Sir Ian’s project.

“Back my vision for the city or lose £50m, Sir Ian warns” P&J 14/04/2010

So exactly whose vision is it then, Sir Ian?

“What is referred to as ‘my vision’ is in fact the vision, aspiration and hopes of many, many Aberdonians for the future economic and civic wellbeing of our city and region as North Sea oil winds down.” BBC20/4/10

Excuse me, I don’t think so.

AGCC: “Fiction: The City Garden Project will destroy the only green space in the city. Fact: It will create new, bigger, greener and more attractive gardens. It is about gardens and open, distinct spaces on different levels, using the natural slopes, for all sorts of activities.”

The development will destroy the existing Gardens and according to the technical feasibility study, all 78 mature trees including the old elms will be chopped down. It is hard to accept that the new “City Garden” could ever support mature trees on the existing scale.

AGCC: “Fiction: It will destroy our history and heritage. Fact: Wherever possible, the project will preserve and enhance our history and heritage.”

This is the most disingenuous of all the ‘myths’ in the document. The first draft of the design brief for the City Squarecalls for a …

“21st century contemporary garden”

…to be built in place of the Victorian park. Union Terrace Gardens was planned by Alexander Marshall Mackenzie, who also designed many of the surrounding buildings including the Art Gallery. If Union Terrace Gardens feel as if they belong, this is the reason why. The city square WILL destroy a key part of our history and heritage.

AGCC: “Fiction: Aberdeen City Council is selling off public land for this project. Fact: The land involved will remain in public ownership.”

This is misleading as it doesn’t explain the whole picture. The land will most likely remain with the Council for the time being. However, the ground will probably be leased for a long period, 125 years has been suggested. A lease-hold on this time-scale while technically not ownership, is nevertheless a significant property deal. Any structure on the land, including the so-called City Garden, will not be publically owned. This will belong to the private company or trust if they get planning permission.

AGCC: “Fiction: Aberdeen City Council is spending money it cannot afford on this project, money that could be better spent elsewhere. Fact: Aberdeen City Council has not allocated any revenue expenditure to the City Garden Project, over the past year.”

We know that considerable Council officer time has been allocated to work spent on the project. We do not know if the City Garden Project intends to reimburse the Council for this or not. ACC minutes show that the Council lawyers have not yet signed off the relevant project agreement that would allow this to happen.

AGCC: “Fiction: The City will be taking on-board future liabilities relating to the construction and operation of the City Garden. Fact: The City has agreed to consider a TIF scheme to provide public sector funding for the project. This will involve the City borrowing funds to invest in the project. The project will stimulate new business investment and generate additional extra economic activity in the area, resulting in an increase in the amount of business rates collected in future years. This will be used to repay the loan plus the interest charges.”

Doh! – “Fiction: The City will be taking on-board future liabilities” but then we are told “This will involve the City borrowing funds to invest in the project”.

The Council are £562M in debt and cannot afford any more borrowing for anything. As has been explained on these pages before by Mick Miller, the version of TIF suggested for the City Square Project involves major financial risk. If the amount of business rates does not increase sufficiently to pay back the loan, then the Council get left holding the baby.

AGCC: “Fiction: The majority of Aberdeen public has voted against redeveloping Union Terrace Gardens. Fact: 11,000 people (less than 10% of the population) participated in the public consultation which revealed that just over half were against the proposal. Many of those were basing their decision on misinformation. The majority indicated a need for change and for the location to be more attractive and accessible.”

This is probably the most outrageous of the so-called myths. A public consultation was held, the public voted No by a significant majority and it was ignored. The public were told that their votes would count. Even Sir Ian Wood acknowledged this in an interview as can be seen on an STV located on Youtube.

“”The citizens of Aberdeen… will have the right to choose. There will be full consultation, it’s coming to the end of it now and they will decide. And that’s democracy in operation. That’s great.”
http://video.stv.tv/bc/news-l2-gardens-190210/?redirect=no

The scale of participation in the consultation was significant. ACSEF, who helped set up the consultation, noted:

“11,943 people went on to submit formal responses that have been recorded in the statistics. This is a huge response rate when compared to similar style consultations. For example, the Edinburgh Tram consultation had just under 3,500 direct responses.”

When, later ACSEF discussed the results of the consultation at a board meeting onthe 22d March 2010, they discussed how to frame the result of the consultation as a favourable outcome for the city square in spite of the No vote:

“If views are roughly split there is an opportunity to say that although the public has spoken this is only in relatively small numbers. Those wishing to see the status quo are in the minority compared to those who wish to see change such as updating and modernising the gardens.”
http://www.acsef.co.uk/uploads/reports/21/22%20March%2010.doc

The statement that the majority indicated a need for change is misleading, the majority said no to the City Square Project and did not endorse it.

If the public were misled during the consultation, who was responsible for the misinformation? Where did these myths come from?

“It is now acknowledged by all involved that the absence of a reference design was a fundamental flaw in the consultation. The consultation asked if people supported the project or not but the common perception was that the conceptual illustrations, based on the technical study, represented a final design. Many based their decision on not liking what they believed was a final design.”
http://thecitygardenproject.com/background.asp

The proponents of the City Square do not accept that they lost the consultation fairly. They cannot believe that the public cogently preferred either the Peacock scheme or the preservation of the existing gardens to a modern city square. But this is what happened.

AGCC: “Fiction: It will be a flat, concrete square. Fact: This is not the case. The design teams have been given a very clear brief that new gardens and space which will have street level access from all four sides will use the existing topography of the site to provide a unique, dramatic and creatively landscaped setting to better reveal and blend with the surrounding historic architecture.”

OK guys, explain to me how you can ”raise the level of the Gardens to that of the surrounding streets” (the Council’s words not mine) and use the existing topography to any significant extent? So where did the idea of a unique and dramatic setting come from?

Here is the description of the existing Gardens as noted in the City Centre Development Framework:

They have a “topography which provides a unique and dramatic setting for the surrounding historic townscape and bridges and an essential component of the identity of the City Centre. “

I suspect that this is just the start of a large PR campaign to sell the concept of the “City Garden Project” to the Aberdeen Public. It will have only a limited impact. Aberdonians are highly educated and can think for themselves. They can make their own mind up about what they want the city centre to look like, whether it is the existing Gardens or a city square at street level. They are smart enough to see what is plausible and what isn’t.

Old Susannah’s Journal No.47 – Carbon (mis)Trust And A Lot Of Hot Air

Aberdeen City, Aberdeenshire, Articles, Community, Creative Writing, Environment, Information, Opinion, Satire and Humour No Responses »

Aug 122011

Old Susannah looks back at the week that was and wonders who’s up to what and why. By Suzanne Kelly.

Old Susannah’s fighting a nasty little digestive problem at the moment – but I’m more worried about the rioting that may soon hit Aberdeenshire. I thought rioting had already broken out when I was making my way home on Friday night through town, but then I realised it was just the usual weekend crew and all was business as usual.

It’s just as well our highly-placed police officials have announced that crime levels are going down in the ‘deen, otherwise the recent spate of attacks and assaults would have me worried.

I am assured there is no correlation between any high-ranking police performance bonuses and the crime stats decreasing. As we know, statistics are facts which can never be manipulated. As for the average policeman on the beat, I am sure they will happily swallow the proposed cuts to their wages with good grace.

Looks like there might be a one-man riot in the Menie area; for some reason the Government is not doing what Donald Trump wants at the moment, and might actually allow a giant windfarm to obscure his view.

This windfarm could mean double-trouble. Not only might all the rich people lined up to buy the 900 holiday homes now change their minds if it means looking at wind turbines, but any change in the wind might make someone’s hair (or wig) look funny. More on that later, but I hope the government will see sense.

(By the way, I think windfarms have a long way to develop and I am not completely sure we are proceeding in the right manner. But at least they are an attempt to solve our energy problems. Whereas I think Donald’s development is obviously proceeding in the right manner, and will solve all of our employment and economic problems. Then again, I am heavily medicated at present).

Time for some more medicine and some definitions.

In The Black

(modern English phrase) to be in profit; origin of this phrase from accountancy standard practice of recording positive figures in black ink and negatives in red ink.

Aberdeen City Council may be millions in the red (with more debt to consultants piling up by the minute), but at least we are well in the black when it comes to carbon. The city produces an eye-watering quantity of the black stuff – here are some figures from an old City report: (insert picture here- table of carbon figures)

Aberdeen City Council, May 2004, “Carbon Management Programme – Outcomes & Action Plan”

1312917898-carbonfiguresfromcitydocument

So looking at this table, as a guess in 2004, staff survey figures indicated that some 22% of staff answering the survey said their car commute to work produced some 20,300 tonnes of carbon in 2002/03. I’m told we’re doing a bang-up job of reducing carbon production now.

The construction of the Loirston Loch stadium will have a carbon footprint. The buses being arranged to get all the fans to and from the stadium will have a carbon footprint. The city didn’t count its air travel in the 2002/03 figures. But other than these small blips, we’re going to plant some trees. Problem solved.

Back in the day when the ‘tree for every citizen’ plan was new, Mr Lochhead of the Scottish Government and Aileen Malone were quoted in a lovely, warm Aberdeen press release. Here are some of the great things it said:-

“Many of the woodlands being created will be in the middle of communities – in one case right underneath a tower block – so they will provide a focal point for community involvement, leisure and recreation”. “They will also soften the urban environment and – by soaking up around 15,000 tonnes of CO2 over 50 years – help provide a greener, cleaner future for the people of Aberdeen.”

I can almost see the forest under the tower block now.

If the press release was referring to the one in Balnagask, I think they’ll find the trees were largely vandalised. I can’t think of any crime, vandalism or fire risks associated with a woodland right under a tower block, so let’s move on.

Back to the carbon question. Wow! – Fifteen thousand tonnes of carbon sucked up by the 94,000 trees in only 50 years.

I’m sure that the lack of straightforward answers had nothing political about it at all

So – if in 2002/03 the City’s buildings, transport, street lights made 7,740,000 tonnes of carbon PER YEAR, then HoMalone’s trees – all of them if they all grow – will offset one year’s worth of City Carbon in a mere 50 years.

Or, looked at another way, if all the trees mature, then each year they would suck up around 0.2% of that pollution each year. Shall I throw away my asthma inhaler now, or wait? (NB – I never had asthma until I moved to Torry. I sometimes wonder if there are any pollutants in the sweet-smelling air, but I swiftly dismiss such thoughts as I cough on exhaust fumes on UnWellington Road).

This is almost enough to make me change my mind about killing – sorry ‘managing’ – the deer to plant HoMalone’s trees. But not quite.

If you are out there Ms Malone, please be assured that I am thinking of you – and so are some ten thousand voters. Go ahead and try killing the deer. Just start hitting the ‘help wanted’ section if you continue to press on. C’mon Aileen – time is wasting, call off your dogs. And hunters/cullers/’managers’. If you want suggestions as to where to put the trees, several readers have written to me, and I would gladly pass their (uncensored) comments on.

Before I leave the subject of how our fearless, pioneering City officials are dealing with carbon pollution, two last thoughts. I asked this question of several environment agencies and the council – and none would answer it:

“When the Loirston Loch stadium is in operation, will there be more, less, or the same amount of air pollution and particulates in the area as there are now?”

That’s right – no one would commit to an answer. Too difficult to guess, as all those trees (if not burnt to the ground) will be sucking up so much area carbon. I’m sure that the lack of straightforward answers had nothing political about it at all. The last thoughts contained in the City’s 2002/03 report are kind of scary ones unless you are a fan of the Big Brother school of government.

At the end of the publication ‘Aberdeen City Council Carbon Management Programme Carbon Management Plan’ there is a list of ‘future possibilities’ which include:-

Install Active Directory software to PCs: This will allow PCs to be remotely monitored and will allow default printer settings (black and white/double sided) to be set to all corporate PCs. A test phase is to be conducted before March 2010 and roll out will be completed by April 2010.
Private Household Renovation: planners to only allow extensions if further work is done on the building to bring it up to current energy standards i.e. insulation levels.

Council staff take heart – your computers will be ‘monitored’. Of course there are ways to print documents without having to monitor staff, but staff won’t mind shedding a few privacy rights for the privilege of improving the highly-scientific carbon stats. Private homeowners – get ready to jump through future hoops if you want to renovate your home. Rest assured in the knowledge it’s all for the best.

Put the wind up

(slang expression, English c WWII) to make someone anxious or nervous; specific origin unknown, but attributed to WWII English infantry.

Unfortunately, someone’s put the wind up Donald Trump. Instead of the usual hot air billowing out from the blowhole of this huge Moby Dick, he’s got aesthetic worries.

No, not about his hair or the one or two wrinkles around his eyes – but someone has the temerity to think about spoiling his view from the Menie Estate. If anyone knows about aesthetics it is the creator of Trump Tower, with its giant brassy-gold letter ‘Ts’ in the lobby and its shiny pink marble cladding – not to mention the gold-plating on the Trump jet. Money can buy class.

Menie wrongs. Donald is against wind power, you see, and a windfarm may go up near his estate.

Well, The Donald will not take that lying down (although a good long lie down might do him good). He’s threatening to take all legal action he can. This apparently includes taking whatever Scottish entity he sees fit to an American court.

Can he do that ? Yes he can.

Does the Don do this kind of thing often? Yes he does.

Are any of his lawsuits frivolous means of attempting to intimidate (legally and financially) those he sues? Obviously not. Do rest assured contractors and municipal governments – Donald Trump hardly ever sues your ilk, and doesn’t always win when he does. Don’t let that thought get the wind up you, now. You might wind up in court, but you have the gratitude of the electorate which you have earned, and you will get what you have earned from them.

Mis-statement

(modern English) to accidentally say something that is not completely accurate. To be ‘economical with the actuality’. Definitely not to lie.

Donald where’s your troosers? Mr Trump was – believe it or not- caught in one or two ‘mis-statement’s in interviews in the past. Come to think of it that is an understatement of mis-statements. How such a privacy-loving man manages to get caught up in so much publicity is a mystery.

One of these factually-challenged statements concerned his Rancho Palos Verdes, California golf course; he said he was building 75 mansions on it. In fact, six were built and three sold as of latest news reports. I make that kind of mistake all the time; I can never remember if I have one flat in Torry, or 86. Obviously the 900 homes he is building in Menie are all going ahead and will all be sold.

The two events are unrelated. Aberdeenshire, RGU, Alex ‘fishy’ Salmond and a host of others believe in Trump. That should be good enough for you and me. It’s not as if he’ll sell the land off now that the planning permission is in place – nothing short of creating the ‘world’s greatest golf course’ will do, and he won’t rest until he’s done it. I for one have complete faith in the intellectual prowess and ethics of our local government when it ensures my environment is protected and all land deals and planning consent matters are handled above board.

Question: Who will be playing on this course?

If it costs you at present over $695 a year to play golf at Trump’s LA course for only $160 a go, then I foresee a problem. If you introduce such a low rate here in Scotland, then every oil exec will be skiving off work to spend all their time playing around. Nothing will ever get done, and the greens will be crowded day and night. See you there! (When it’s finished).

I will keep an eye open on the flat-swapping sites to see if anyone will trade their new Menie home for my Torry Flat. Or maybe not – I would far rather stay in Torry.

For some fine examples of the word ‘mis-statement’ in use, the following link will be of interest: http://www.businessinsider.com/donald-trump-eliot-spitzer-lawsuit-video-2011-4

Sometimes I wonder if the doings in Aberdeen aren’t what’s giving me a stomach ache. But for now, back to bed for me, and at least I sleep sounder than some of our officials do – or should do anyway.

Next week: A deer update from the City which begs for the word ‘disingenuous’ to be defined.

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