Football Archives - Page 24 of 27

The Passing Of A Legend – A Tribute To Eddie Turnbull

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Featured, Information, Opinion, Sport No Responses »

May 052011

Voice’s David Innes pays tribute to a true football legend.

Mere words are difficult to fashion into any sort of coherence to describe the gratitude those of us of a certain age feel for Eddie Turnbull, who roared into sleepy, plodding Pittodrie in 1965 and gave Aberdeen fans their pride back.

I had the pleasure of meeting him fourteen years ago, and the afternoon I spent with him in the Barnton Thistle Hotel I still regard as three of the best hours of my life.

He was 74 then, frail after a lung operation and tiny in frame. Not so in personality, neither in enthusiasm and passion for the game which was his obsession. Twenty six years after he’d left Pittodrie having just failed to win the league title with the Dons, he still retained great affection for the club and his recollections when probed by me on trainspotterly specifics of the 1967 USA tour were as clear as the water with which he would later dilute the bottle of 12 year old Glenlivet gifted him as a token of my gratitude and respect.

From 1965 to 1971, this “wee mannie frae Falkirk” as he described himself, revolutionised Aberdeen FC.

That is not too strong a verb. His first result, beating Rangers 2-0, endeared him to the fans. His new-broom coaching methods and legendary fierce discipline earned him the respect of the players and his iron will even had the club’s directors wondering if they’d perhaps have preferred a yes man in charge, for he wasn’t that.

Having endured the perils and hardships of serving in the North Atlantic merchant fleet running cargo to Murmansk during the Second World War in the face of fascist bombs and torpedoes, a few local businessmen in suits and trilbies were hardly going to frighten Eddie Turnbull.

None ever refers to him as “Eddie”. He was, and is “Boss”. That’s respect, but it’s also affection.

The 1970 Scottish Cup win was his most tangible achievement and the following season’s thrilling title chase was proof that the squad he had patiently assembled was equal to Celtic’s which had reached the European Cup final the season before.

Many of us of that vintage, who marvelled at the coolness of Martin Buchan, the energy of Davie Robb, the sniper-like predatory accuracy of Joe Harper and the guile of Steve Murray remain convinced that had the manager not returned to his beloved Hibs, the title would have been won in 1971-72 and sustained success would have been ours a decade before Fergie took us to previously-unimaginable heights.

The Hibs team he built in the early 1970s played beautiful football and it is surprising that 1972’s League Cup was their only trophy success. A major regret, he told me, was that Hibs did not beat Aberdeen to European success a decade before Gothenburg, succumbing tamely on reaching the quarter final of the European Cup-Winners Cup.

“They didn’t want it enough”, was his opinion.

He left Hibs in 1980 and was lost to club football – a huge oversight given the state that it’s now in and considering the foresight he might have brought to it. Yet, he said that the greatest pleasure he derived from football was seeing young men make their way in the world, helping them develop their innate talent and seeing them and their families thrive and prosper.

Although he was a hard man, this was an indication of the standards that he set and which he bred into those who shared his fitba vision and passion. I still have regular contact with some of his Pittodrie players. None ever refers to him as “Eddie”. He was, and is “Boss”. That’s respect, but it’s also affection.

Not only have the Dons and Hibs lost a legend – that’s a TRUE legend, look up its definition – the football world at large has lost an innovator, a tactical genius and above all, a passionate advocate for all that was good and artistic in the game.

I thought he would live forever and I suppose for those of us with memories of his Aberdeen teams from 1965-71, he will.

Sleep easy Boss, you’ve earned it.

The REAL SPL – Where All Clubs Are Equal

Aberdeen City, Articles, Community, Information, Opinion, Sport No Responses »

Apr 292011

By Fred Wilkinson with thanks to The REAL SPL.

For my sins, I am football fan and a diehard Dandy, but for many reasons, not withstanding the demands of my role in producing Aberdeen Voice, I am unable to attend games as often as I would like.

Instead, I indulge in animated, all too often loud, heated conversation with the radio, and very occasionally the telly, sure in my mind at the time that all on the park and on the touchline can hear me, and would do well to listen.

Often in desperate attempts to influence the fortunes of my once all conquering home team, I find myself deliberately facing the general direction of the match venue.

So from my position close to the radio, Pittodrie is the pasta cupboard, Easter Road is a chimney viewed from the window, and Ibrox is the pots and pans shelf… you get the gist. Ineffective, bizarre and utterly futile certainly, but at least I demonstrate huge commitment and effort; very much like Darren Mackie – minus the red boots and the lucrative contract.

I miss out on the sharing of views, the wisecracks and the banter I have come to expect from being there in person as a good game progresses. But all is not lost, there is enough room next to the radio for a laptop logged on to the Aberdeen-Mad fans forum where a range of views and arguments are exchanged before, during, after and in between games. From informed to infuriating, well measured to well mad, bouquets and brickbats, outrageous on occasion but always entertaining and often unbelievably hilarious. I am hooked.

Many fans fear that the Old Firm are slowly but surely strangling the game in Scotland

It was on said forum that I came across a newly formed campaign group who go by the name ‘The REAL SPL’. I found their philosophy rather refreshing, and their ambitions worthy of comment and a degree of respect.

I was compelled to find out more from their freshly constructed website.

The REAL SPL plan to run and publish a virtual league in parallel with the SPL from seasons 2011/12 onwards. They will allocate points on the same basis as the SPL for games played but no points will be awarded when a team plays one of the Old Firm.

The team with the most points will then be declared Champions of The REAL SPL and there are plans to purchase a REAL trophy to be awarded to the winners.

It appears this initiative is an attempt to bring back the interest and excitement to fans who have become disillusioned with the SPL mainly as the result of the Old Firm’s disproportionate influence on all aspects of the Scottish game. Aspects ranging from league construction, financial distribution to television contracts, and particularly of late and more importantly, the public image of Scottish Football as a whole. This extends to their influence with the football authorities, commercial rights and revenue generation.

Many fans fear that the Old Firm are slowly but surely strangling the game in Scotland, and if action is not taken there will be even more severe repercussions in years to come.

To reflect on my own ‘virtual game’ in the setting of my kitchen as described above, could this idea not be viewed as equally ‘Ineffective, bizarre and utterly futile’? – Apparently not.

Already, the idea has captured the collective imagination of followers to the point that many fans are pledging to stay away from old firm games, but rather than rob the game of money, will attend more games involving other teams or ensure the money they save will go to their club in other ways: ways in which the old firm cannot lay claim to a share.

“The number of fans going to games in Scotland is falling year on year. There are many reasons for this but we believe that an uncompetitive league is one of the most important.”

Few would argue that the Scottish game, as with my beloved, yet sadly underachieving Dandies could do with a ‘leggie up’, but one worries that an idea, however well meaning and potentially beneficial cannot inspire change without a significant level of public support. So I ask, what are the indications that a significant level of public support exists?

“We ran a poll for two days, when we started the site, to find out whether people agreed with our aims. In this time, we had over 1,200 people complete the poll with a 95% approval rating for The Real SPL”

The site itself recorded an impressive 115,000 hits in its first two days in operation – An excellent start indeed, and it is only a start.

I believe the REAL SPL may have more far reaching ambitions. Perhaps to become more than simply a virtual league and a snub to the old firm, and possibly develop a strong platform for REAL football fans to air their views on how our game should evolve. Perhaps to initiate campaigns for specific changes free of the selfish business interests of the ‘Big Two’.

“The fans want a competitive, exciting and ambitious league and we have come to the conclusion that it’s time for a change. We are excited by the challenge of bringing interest in football back to the fans who may not have attended a game in a while.”

You can offer your support for The REAL SPL by visiting their website, or contributing to discussions on Aberdeen-Mad. You may also wish to join their group page on Facebook.

“One of the things we are looking to do is get more Facebook fans than the SPL. They have around 13,500 and we have 500… Its a tall order I know but it will demonstrate the backing that we have for a more competitive league”

Old Susannah’s Journal No. 32

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Apr 222011

Voice’s Old Susannah casts her eye over recent events, stories, and terms and phrases familiar as well as freshly ‘spun’, which will be forever etched in the consciousness of the people of Aberdeen and the Northeast.

There have been a fair share of animal cruelty stories in the last few months; Donald Forbes will soon have is day in Court (looks like 16th May at Aberdeen Sheriff Court – if you’re free, do stop in and wish him well). But there are some other charming people who deserve a mention this week.

Picture this: you are frail, in your 80s, and a youngish girl has been sent as your carer. Just hope it isn’t Kirsty Rae, a home carer for Aberdeenshire Council. She has been caught apparently stealing hundreds of pounds from elderly, vulnerable older women – one believed to be 89 years old. It is a crime how little money our oldest residents are expected to live on to start with – but can you imagine the stress for these women – thinking you had lost your money – and worrying if you were losing your senses?

Allegedly Ms Rae has previous form – she is one to watch in future – actually just watch your older relatives and your wallets if she is within a few hundred yards.

No doubt she has a problem, maybe had a tough childhood, money problems or some other reason we should all feel really sorry for her – and no doubt has reasons why she should not get a custodial sentence. As for me, I will reserve my sympathy for the robbed women – who have lived through World War II, probably worked hard and scrimped and saved all their lives.

Nice one Kirsty.

My second man to watch in the news is the Aberdeen Football Club fan who apparently head-butted a 12-year-old boy.

The boy was asking for it – he had the nerve to be wearing a Celtic jersey AND was in a shopping centre – with his parents. Matthew Brown is thought to be pleading to avoid a football ban – he had been drinking you see. I guess that makes it all right.

The little boy will obviously be very apprehensive and intimidated for some time to come, and was nauseous and ill after the vicious attack. But hey, Matt probably won’t do it again. Unless he has been drinking. Matt – it is only a game, and not an excuse to attack children who choose a different team than yours. No need to get the younger generation involved in any of your personal gripes. Deal?

There is of course no reason why a party would want to stick to the usually generous promises it makes in a manifesto

On a happier note, spring is in the air (well, the haar is pretty thick anyway), and election fever is gripping the City and Shire. In the pubs and clubs the talk is all around the AV – Alternative Voting system referendum, and with the exciting leaflets flooding through the letterboxes explaining how honest, gifted and wonderful each candidate is, it is all anyone is thinking about.

Is the suspense getting to you? I would love to hear your thoughts on this exciting election looming for the 5th May. But what does it all mean? What will it mean for the Country? For our great democratic, unified City? Perhaps looking at some of the terms in depth will help.

Manifesto: (Noun) Work of fiction used to deceive; usually deliberately written to be so long and tedious that anyone who tries reading one will utterly forget their own name, let alone remember the manifesto’s economic policy on EU agricultural subsidies or educational targets.

A party just isn’t a party without a good manifesto; the manifesto gets to have its own ‘launch’ party at which the press stifle yawns and try to think of interesting questions on a document that is ultimately as exciting as a telephone directory – only a lot less believable. There is of course no reason why a party would want to stick to the usually generous promises it makes in a manifesto.

Some parties – for some reason Liberal Democrats in the last prime ministerial elections come to mind – promise the world. Free education for all, ice cream for everybody, and two cars in each garage.

I know – perhaps we can have a consultation on this: maybe the public can be given a choice of route options

They then find themselves with a tiny bit of power, and needing to have a slice of the pie, they fold like a cheap suit and do as they are told by the more powerful party (for some reason I think of the Tories). If your manifesto promises no tuition fees, there is some possibility that one or two of the voters will notice if you are a bit less than good to your word. But then again, it is not as if they can do anything about it.

I’ve had a look at the 89 page Liberal Democrat Manifesto, and see that they intend to deliver something called the Aberdeen Western Peripheral Route; this pledge is filed under the phrase ‘for efficiency’. I know – perhaps we can have a consultation on this: maybe the public can be given a choice of route options and vote on the matter after some road shows.

Old Susannah is getting old and her memory is going, because I mistakenly remember sitting at an ‘Aberdeen Civic Forum’ meeting in the town hall, where NESTRANS promised that the route would be finished in 2012. Maybe I got that wrong: perhaps it is the LibDems that will be finished.

But there is good news: The LibDems care about wildlife: From the manifesto:

“The nation’s farmers are also stewards of the countryside, playing a key role in protecting Scotland’s wildlife and habitats”.

Presumably, with the exception of inconvenient deer.

Polling Station: (Noun) A place where, if you are lucky enough to find it, you will be given a numbered piece of paper, have your name written on a numbered sheet of voters names – and then be told that your vote is totally anonymous.

You will have a choice of parties to vote for – Raving Monster Looney party being amongst the more conservative and long lasting of them.

You will wonder if you are looking at photographs of fashion models and movie stars at first

It is the 21st century and we are a technologically advanced society. This is why we are voting using pieces of paper which are stuffed into a wooden box, then later taken to a larger counting area and people hand-count the votes for hours into the night and the next morning.

Mistakes are never made, and no one ever counts incorrectly. You might think that an electronic voting system would be a good idea, but there is something to be said for this method. I’m just too polite to say it.

I said it can be difficult to find your polling station – particularly as some 14,000 Aberdeen residents received their polling cards telling them where to go to vote: to a school that had been closed down some months before. To be fair to the Council, it would be awfully hard to keep track of all the schools we’ve closed, and you cannot be expected to check all the fine details when you print a couple of thousand polling cards.

Flyer: (noun) Printed page delivering short, factual, truthful messages. The means by which political parties remind you of all the good they have done and will do.

The person receiving a flyer through their letter box will religiously read all flyers and save them for posterity, if the dog hasn’t chewed up the flyer and the flyer deliverer’s hand first. They come in fabulous colour schemes such as sickly gold and dark purple to seem all the more cheerful. You will wonder if you are looking at photographs of fashion models and movie stars at first, then you realise it is pictures of your would-be elected officials.

Remember, if it is printed in a flyer, it is true. Candidates are very careful not to promise more than they can deliver, and with our services and society in the shape they are today, there is very little left to promise anyway.

NEXT WEEK: news on FOI requests into Union Terrace Gardens and City property sold to Stewart Milne; Deer update (the deer have 19 days left as things stand before the blackmail ultimatum is up), and more definitions.

Trouble In Tannadice – Dons Top Six Hopes Fade

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Mar 082011

‘Where to start?’ asks Dons fan Stefan Barr as he takes stock of Aberdeen v’s Dundee United at Tannadice – a ‘make or break’ game regarding the Dons’ chances of a top six finish.

Three things that happen every time we visit Tannadice are:

1. The concession of soft goals.
2. United always seem to get 2 v 1 on our full backs especially in the first half.
3. Their midfield hunt in packs.

We were pretty meek in that first half with United keeper Pernis only having one save that I can remember. Aluko was nowhere and Young, whilst he tries his best, just isn’t up to the required standard. Young for me is a decent squad player – a substitute – but due to wage controls, cut backs and injuries, he’s become a bigger and more regular piece of the jigsaw.

Zander Diamond’s inclusion on the back of four clean sheets was no surprise having heard Brown describe him as an ‘established player’ at the weekend.
For the first 20 minutes he seemed fairly solid except on one occasion when Goodwillie evaded him to flash a header wide.
From our only attack of note in the first half he sustained a head gash resulting in him going off for treatment. He returned for a few minutes, but the referee didn’t seem satisfied that the bleeding had stopped and off he went again this time not to return.

The first goal was poorly conceded, and highlighted our achilles heel – set pieces. Jamie ‘Stay at home’ Langfield never relieves his defence by coming for crossballs.

Being a man light didn’t help but it does not excuse our defending for the first goal, nor the push on Hartley referee Brian Winter failed to spot . Had Diamond not gone off injured, would we have still suffered the same fate? Probably yes! But he would certainly have fared better than McArdle who replaced him.

I was surprised Vujadinovic didn’t come on instead as he turned in a decent performance v St Johnstone. McArdle masquerading as the white Jerel Ifil was abysmal. His distribution of the ball, being caught out of position, losing the flight of the ball, playing us into trouble and his short pass backs all contributed to a dismal showing.

Magennis changed the dynamic of our approach in the second half and started to win his duels with the United centre backs

The second goal was also poorly conceded with McNamee heading back into the midfield area. He might have expected some help from the 5 man midfield to mop up, however Hartley was nowhere to be seen after an encouraging opening 5 minutes. Instead, Conway latched onto the loose ball, put the laces through it, and although it moved, Langfield crumbled.

It’s surely the end of the road for Langfield as he’s had **** up after **** up after **** up.
Sure, people will point to strong recent performances. However you just can’t legislate for the errors he continues to make. We should look to sign someone like Enckelman – a solid reliable keeper.

I can’t recall Paul ‘the second coming of Christ’ Hartley having a good game this year. He’s caught flat footed more often than not and as a
consequence Milsom is doing the work of two. I don’t think Hartley is the answer. His legs are gone and he’s been shown up against the better teams of late.

McNamee and Smith had difficult games. They don’t seem keen on taking their opponent on and driving for the byline.

( H.T. Dundee united 2 – Aberdeen 0 )

Josh Magennis changed the dynamic of our approach in the second half and started to win his duels with the United centre backs – unlike Vernon.
After the goal (credit to Vernon Crespo and Magennis) we had them on the rack for 5 minutes.

Milsom had a great drive saved well by Pernis and Considine headed over from a corner, but then we conceded what looked to me to be another poor goal.

Take nothing away from Swanson’s strike, but it looked like two players got sucked in from a throw in, and with so much ease, United threaded a ball in behind our defence.

After losing the third goal we just seemed to huff and puff our way to full time with Magennis threatening again, but Pernis made a smart save at his front post. Sometimes you have to hold your hands up and say we were beaten by a better team, and United are by far a better team than we are at the moment.

( F.T. Dundee united 3 – Aberdeen 1 )

Craig Brown has a lot of work to do in the summer but there are some positive signs. Milsom’s a find, and players will be returning from injury.

Anyway tonight was another case of Deja Vu at that ‘coup o’ a grun’.

Roll on Saturday
Heeds up and COYR!

Former Dons Dig Deep To Preserve Club Heritage

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Mar 042011

Wary of getting too optimistic following too many recent kicks in the teeth, in spite of tangible improvements, Dons fans are still coming out of rehab from the barrel-scraping lows of 2010’s onfield results. Some are on to solids now in the form of a lightly-boiled egg, but many are still just capable of sitting upright and sooking a little clear soup through a straw. A few hard core stoics have gone back to full-strength half time pie consumption, the wee soldiers. David Innes sounds an uncharacteristically optimistic note.

Despite the trauma Dons fans have been through and the current murmurings of discontent over the almost rubber-stamped move to Loirston, there is still a lot of love out there for the Reds.

Despite what the detractors and backbiters say, and sometimes it seems that the Grey Toon has more than its fair share of those ready to glory in the club’s problems, AFC is still a massive part of the North East community and remains, in spite of all the gloom, a cultural and sporting focal point and beacon for thousands.

The AFC Heritage Trust exists to preserve the history of the club and its links with communities in the city and hinterland and we’ve publicised it before https://aberdeenvoice.com/2010/06/down-pittodrie-way/#more-122 .

A measure of the importance with which the Trust’s work is regarded is the impressive £740 collected from fans’ donations at extremely short notice at last week’s home fixture with Hearts. It was heartening to have Dons fans drop change into a bucket once they realised the common cause for which hard cash was being solicited. Many took the opportunity to take the publicity leaflets offered by collectors to find out more about the Trust, its work and its aspirations. You can do so here http://www.afcheritage.org

Of course, a large part of the club’s community are those fortunate enough to have pulled the sacred Red or, formerly, the blessed Black and Gold over their heads before going out to do battle on behalf of the North East in over a century of mostly proud history. The club’s Former Players Association is thriving. Many members who did not spend their entire careers at Pittodrie, or who are only tiny bit part players in Aberdeen’s history, retain huge affection for the club and describe their time at Pittodrie as being among the best times of their lives.

The FPs realise the importance of the work being done by the Heritage Trust and to help the Trust’s efforts, donated a thousand pounds to Trust funds at half time in last week’s game.

The Trust’s treasurer, Bob Bain, was delighted to accept the cheque from FP representatives and Dons stalwarts of yesteryear, Bobby Wishart, of the 1954-55 League-winning side and Jimmy Wilson from the mid-60s who was the first player I ever saw place a penalty kick into a corner of the net, having fooled the Motherwell goalkeeper into diving in the wrong direction.

That was on 3 December 1966, it happened at the King Street End, it was a day of typical Aberdeen driving sleet and we won 2-1. Instant recall, but yet I can forget where I left the car in the airport car park after two days away. That’s the impact the Dons have on many of us, and if you are also thus afflicted, the Trust would be glad to have you aboard.

Thanks to the FPs, the collectors and the fans who donated.

Lament For Aiberdeen

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Mar 032011

By Bob Smith.

Greet fer oor eence great city
Fer Aiberdonians hae great pity
A toon run by a bunch o eeseless feels
A cooncil in the pooch o business chiels

Greet fer oor eence bonnie toon
Faar we’ve bin brocht roon
Ti a city run bi them aat’s rich
Faar protest they wid like ti ditch

Greet fer democracy twixt Don an Dee
A toon faar the cooncillors boo the knee
Kowtowin ti aa thon Acsef bunch
Fit for? Maybe the odd free lunch?

Greet fer the greenbelt an hae a groan
A briggie ti be biggit near Tillydrone
A fitba stadium fit glowes reid
The Loch o Loirston’ll seen bi deid

Greet fer the green lungs o the toon
Faar UTG’s trees wull be cut doon
Ti be replaced by a rich chiel’s vision
Time we aa treated iss wi derision

Fit’s happenin noo we shud lament
An banish oor cooncillors ti Tashkent
Bit lit us nae get ower doon in the moo
We micht yet dunce ti a jig fae Iron Broo

©Bob Smith “The Poetry Mannie”2010

Old Susannah’s Dictionary No.24

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Feb 182011

Voice’s Old Susannah comments on current events ducking under the radar as well as making the headlines, and enlightens us with definitions of some tricky terms with a locally topical taste.

It seems the Ministry of Defence is in hot water again, although I don’t see what the fuss is all about. The Armed Forces had to make budget cuts (probably because of all those planes they bought can’t actually fly), and are letting people go.

In keeping with their historically tight budget controls, people being made redundant were informed by email, thereby saving the expense of postage stamps and letters and avoiding the tedious exercise of telling people face-to-face they would soon be jobless.

What they probably should have done was to leave a portable computer on a train with the info in it – that seems to be how they usually prefer to release information.

I guess it might have been a bit inconvenient to the people on the front lines in Afghanistan getting these emails, but remember, these are professional soldiers. No doubt they will read the email announcing their joblessness, and just get on with the war (or police action, or intervention, or whatever exactly we’re calling this one at the moment). It’s not as if the thought of unemployment might prey on their minds when they are on the front lines trying to stay alive, and since the UK economy is in such rosy shape, no doubt these folks will have a choice of high-flying jobs at their fingertips when they get back home.

For those lucky unemployed ex-soldiers, if they’re coming home to Aberdeen, we’ll have a host of jobs related to the Community Arena. Yes, Dr (of what I don’t know) Margaret Bochel has delivered a report following the Loirston hearing: the Community Arena Stadium will be an iconic building that will attract people from all over the world and make us all rich. Pollution, greenbelt and animal habitats pale into insignificance when compared to the importance of a new home for the Dons.

In case you didn’t know the people involved in this scheme include someone from the Cove Bay Rangers, who have a related scheme.
And yes, it is just a coincidence that Kate Dean’s husband is connected to CBR (STOP PRESS: I have just received the following advice about Mr Dean’s connection to the CBR: “…the information on the ACC website refers to Cove Rangers Supporters Club, which is very different from the Board of Cove Rangers. As Mr Dean is also a referee, I was told that it is unlikely that the information on the website is correct as it would not be appropriate for him to be Chair of the Supporters Club”. Old Susannah must apologise for thinking there would be some kind of link between the supporters club and the football team itself. Silly mistake.

I don’t think there can be much fun at Glencraft just now – it’s one obstacle after another.
Manager Andy Laing – who has given years to keeping the dream of Glencraft alive – has been given a little rent increase by our beloved City Council. In the old days the rent was just £1, reflecting the social importance of the business. And what was the rent increase our Council came up with for this historic factory which does so much for people with sight impairment or who face other ability challenges?

While the new rent fee wouldn’t even pay for a decent consultant, Glencraft now have to find £120,000. This isn’t a great deal of money after all; it’s only 1% of the £11 million the City wrote off the other year in bad debts.

it is plain to see that we’ve got the best trained councillors in the northern hemisphere solving our problems

Glencraft will manage no doubt; if not, then it is a dog-eat-dog economy after all. But in case you want to show your support, get to Glencraft next time you need a piece of furniture however large or small (or even go and buy a scented candle). Old Susannah bought a lovely wooden chest there recently, and will be back soon. Glencraft is open evenings and Saturdays.

Finally a small complaint – the Post Office doesn’t seem to be running very smoothly at the moment. I keep checking my letterbox, but still the Valentines cards from Dean and Milne haven’t arrived. Posties – please check your bags; many thanks.

Words in the news this week…

Training

The sharpest City Council minds know they need to stay on top of the latest developments and trends, or they will be left behind, looking like old-fashioned throwbacks unaware of current best practice in a changing world. Training is the answer. To train (verb) is the ‘act of imparting or receiving information or skills’. Last financial year, Aberdeen City Councillors only had £10,000 or so spent on their training needs (just slightly over the figure Ms Dean claimed in expenses that year), but this was money well spent. The City’s web pages don’t readily show who went on the courses, where they were held or how long they lasted, but it is plain to see that we’ve got the best trained councillors in the northern hemisphere solving our problems.

We do know what the courses were called, and you will be impressed to hear that they included ‘Best Practice in Employment Services’ which will explain the recent smooth handling of the Council’s staffing / salary issues. The employer/employee relationships at the Council don’t just happen by accident – it is all a matter of tact and diplomacy, fostered by a great training programme.

Another training course you and I pay for, ‘Equality is Essential for Elected Members’ springs to mind; I guess Councillors are told not to discriminate, and that would explain why men and women at the Council are paid equally. This would also explain why Glencraft, recipient of a rent rise from £1 to £120,000 this year, are being treated just like everyone else. I suppose that in these cash-strapped times, any councillor or dignitary receiving a peppercorn rent will have been handed a similar rent rise.

The more intellectual councillor can attend courses such as “Hot Topic – Granite City Grit”, “Access to Information”, and “Safe and Stronger”. I can see the Grit being a hard issue to get a grip on, seeing as we can’t afford any and the ‘Access to Information’ course is not an easy matter either, seeing as they now want to close a half dozen libraries, so information will be harder to come by. ‘Safer and Stronger’ might involve how to work out at the gym, but I suspect it refers to the safer and stronger economy we have because of the plans of our elected officials.

But the course that clearly has had the most impact? The “Public Value Seminar” of course.

There also is something called a “Distributed Leadership Seminar”; perhaps this is where the Liberal Democrat / SNP ‘coalition’ learns how to share the leadership of the City in such a seamless fashion. But the course that clearly has had the most impact? The “Public Value Seminar” of course.

Association for Public Service Excellence (noun)

A federation set up to recognise outstanding performance throughout the UK by elected officials and local governments.

John Stewart will happily explain his role representing Aberdeen City Council on the Association for Public Service Excellence board to anyone who wants to know, but as he’s a busy man just now, I’ll give it a go.

The “Association for Public Service Excellence” or ‘APSE’ to its friends serves several useful functions in today’s society, keeping the public in the luxurious style it is accustomed to. Community Councillors from across the UK get together for an Awards Ceremony, no doubt the taxpayer funds the trip and hotel out of gratitude. I am pretty sure that the BAFTA and Oscar/Academy Awards were started as a reaction to the publicity and glamour that APSE award ceremonies attract.

You will in no way be surprised to hear that Aberdeen has nearly won some awards. Did you know that in the 2010 APES awards, Aberdeen was a runner up in the Best Employee and Equality Initiative category – sponsored by Unison? It is a strange thing that we didn’t win it. After all, we have paid men and women equally for a few days now and Unison officials do work closely with the Council, even if it is in the context of Unison trying to save its members from job losses and salary cuts.

Other awards we nearly won were for our ‘Best community & Neighbourhood Initiatives” – who else has the foresight to close every community and neighbourhood local service they can and replace them with a giant stadium out of town? How did we lose that one?

I could not find any photographs of Nicole Kidman or Brad Pitt at the last APSE award ceremony, but there are lovely shots of local councillors from across the UK in their finest evening attire; just visit the APSE website for all the glamour you would expect. Better luck next year! Keep your award acceptance speech handy, Mr. Stewart: You’ll be needing it one of these years.

Outsource (verb)

To outsource or privatise is to take an asset or service from the public sector (City Council for instance), and sell it off to a private company or invent a ‘private’ company to do what taxpayer money has paid local government to do in the first place. The benefit is that the taxpayer is liberated from responsibility in future for the asset – this is also known as ‘selling off the family silver’. We have seen for instance how much more efficient and affordable our trains became after privatisation.

If I can’t understand how this will save money in the long term, that’s just my lack of education

Pensioners in retirement homes in Aberdeen rejoice! No doubt following consultation with you and your families, the City are considering putting your care in the hands of the Private Sector. You see, the Council needs to save money, and it costs money to care for you. So if we take the money the taxpayers contribute to the city, give it to a private company that is in business to make money, your homes will magically cost less to run.

To ensure everything goes smoothly, some councillors are suggesting councillors be on the board of the company that will run your homes. Since private companies need to turn profits unlike (obviously) the city, there may be a few changes and a few corners cut, but seeing as how this would never happen without your agreement, congratulations on this wise business move. If I can’t understand how this will save money in the long term, that’s just my lack of education. Still, when has the Council ever steered us wrong?

Marks & Spencer Dine in for Two for a Tenner follow up:

Some time back I wrote about the Marks & Spencer ‘Dine in for 2 for £10’ offers, and how they were destroying the fabric and morals of our otherwise genteel society, and how the SNP were working to save us by getting the Scottish Parliament to ban M&S from making these offers.

Well, I need to confess: I’ve done a deal with M&S. There I was last weekend in M&S, looking for sensible socks and radishes, when I heard a crowd of excited people. When I looked up, all became clear. In giant red and pink signs, Marks & Sparks was offering yet another deal involving alcohol. But no £10 deal this time – no, the price had been doubled.

A man offered me a box of candy if I took the deal (I think this is referred to as a ‘sweetener’), and as a swarm of people of all ages around me fought over strawberries and mashed potato side dishes, I knew I had been sucked in. So – I recklessly blew my entire food budget, and have nothing to show for it but two sirloin steaks, a bag of salad (‘leaf’ or ‘herb’ they call it), strawberries, scallops, chocolates – and of course booze – which is the real reason anyone buys into this scheme at all. Yes, there are now two ‘Irish Coffees’ as they are known, sitting in my kitchen. I can think of nothing else – they came specially ‘prepared’ for me in glass containers which I can re-use – making it pretty certain I will be making more Irish Coffee in the future: this is another insidious way M&S keep me coming back for more.

Will I keep both Irish Coffees for myself? Share one? Have one now and another another time? Will I be able to handle it, or will I wake up days later in a police cell, holding an empty coffee glass and a half-eaten box of chocolates? Don’t let this happen to you – tell the SNP you fully support their plan to stop Marks & Spencer. It’s too late for me – I’m used to eating decent pre-packaged food and nice steaks with wine. I hope you learn from my mistakes and save yourselves.

Coming soon: statutory consultee, expert, ‘green spaces new places’ initiative; greed

‘Nigg’les Aroon The Loch

Aberdeen City, Articles, Creative Writing, Opinion, Satire and Humour No Responses »

Feb 182011

By Bob Smith.

Fit a stramash roon Loirston wye
Aboot the Dons new fitba hame
The local fowk are up in airms
Claimin some are nae playin the game

Noo richt awa I maun declare
An interest in aa iss spik
As I masel can be fun
At Pittodrie ilka second wikk

I hiv an interest as weel
In conservation o greenbelt lan
An fir mair than 5 decades
I’ve bin a wildlife fan

Noo aat’s said let’s hae a look
At the argiement for an agin
Tho’ ti build on protected lan
Iss ti me wid be a sin

Fir greenbelt lan it wid seem
Planners dinna hae muckle time
Nivver myn the flora an fauna
Jist cover it wi steen an lime

The Community Cooncil hiv great doots
Aboot the traffic an the parkin
Cloggin up aa the road arteries
Iss scheme they think is barkin

It’s nae surprise yon Stewartie Milne
Is richt ahin aa this caper
Wi lots o his business freens
An the “rag” o a local paper

I’ve hid a wird wi a fyow Dons fans
Faa ken the move is nigh
Maist are nae in favour
O a move oot Loirston wye

Bit losh I’m fair dumfoonert
Fit wye AFC canna upgrade
Aa the stands an ither bitties
Wi a new Main Stand ti be made

The new biggin it’ll glow aa reid
Fin the Dons play nicht matches
It micht be thocht a UFO
An be mentioned in RAF dispatches

The P&J – oh fit a surprise
Think aathing’ll be a bonus
They shud tell us aa the facts
An hae an impartial focus

Noo fowk aa ower the toon
At iss thocht will faa aboot
An impartial view fae the P&J
We’ll nivver hae I doot

Stewartie’s On A Shooglie Peg

Aberdeen City, Articles, Creative Writing, Satire and Humour No Responses »

Feb 042011

By Bob Smith.

Stewartie Milne could be a loser
Dis he ken fit he is deein?
Backin some kittlesome ideas
Lots o fowk are disagreein

He’s weel ti the forefront
Promotin twa SPL tiers o ten
Bit some o his cronies say
Awa back an think again

He’s a freen o yon Trump
So must back use o CPOs
Stewartie min tak great care
Ye micht get a bleedy nose

Wi ACSEF he’s in bed
Wi Sir Ian Widd he cavorts
His the mannie nae sense ava ?
He maun be oot o sorts

The new stadium at Loirston
Is a must the chiel dis spoot
Maist Dons fans are nae convinced
An lots they hiv great doot

So Stewartie jist tak note
Tho’ millions ye micht hae
The fowk faa div oppose ye
They micht yet win the day

Loirston Loch – What The P&J Didn’t Tell You

Articles, Community, Featured, Information, Opinion No Responses »

Jan 212011

By Suzanne Kelly.

An epic eight plus hour public hearing was held on Friday 14 January at the Town House to discuss the future for the greenbelt land and wildlife at Loirston Loch. Will the wildlife haven continue to exist or will a 21,000 seat football pitch for Aberdeen Football Club be built?

The Press & Journal covered this matter the next day with two articles on Page Two, and an editorial. No prizes will be given for those who guessed the P&J are fully behind the AFC Stadium scheme.

Before going further I will put my cards on the table: I am against building in the greenbelt in principle, particularly when such a giant scheme is proposed, which clearly will have a negative effect on the whole area. I will explain my opinions more later – but they are based on environmental and social concerns. I do not stand to either gain or lose a cent if it is built or not. Sadly, there is no hint in the Press & Journal pro-stadium articles that a source of stories as well as advertisements are AFC and Mr Milne, whose homes are often featured or advertised. You might ask yourself if their support of their advertisers is wholly based on journalistic integrity.

Ms Kate Dean convened the meeting. At least one Community Council had formally objected to her taking this role (as did I by e-mail). A list of facts and allegations at the start of the hearing were presented which seemed to imply she would carry a bias towards the planning application going through.

The City (it was alleged) had favoured the Loirston site; City money had been spent towards the proposal’s investigation, a possibility of land ownership conflict may have existed, and Kate’s connection to Cove Bay were all cited as grounds for her not to act as convener or even attend this hearing.

Indeed Ms Dean had declared her interest at a different ACC meeting, and decided on that occasion she would not be able to take part.

At this hearing she merely said she was not and had never been on the Cove Rangers Board (although she did not take the opportunity to clarify her role in the Cove Rangers Supporters’ club).

Having said she would show no bias, how did she do?

At some points Ms Dean allowed questions that called upon the individual objectors to make conclusions. It was clear that most objectors had never been in such a formal situation before. For instance, community council representatives were asked to explain how they concluded that there was little or no support for the stadium.

this document did not mention that MSP Richard Baker had written in opposition to the plan, or that MP Anne Begg had forwarded correspondence from her constituents against it.

Some of those questioned said that they had asked at their community council meetings for opinions, had canvassed the wider community, and that they had received many comments against and found a solitary comment in favour. Some mentioned apathy, and were asked to expand on this term. It was repeated at different points that there exists a view, rightly or wrongly, that Mr Milne seems to get his own way in Aberdeen.

Ms Dean offered that this was untrue. Well, maybe he doesn’t win 100% of the time with planners – but his goal average so far looks impressive.

One of the points raised by objectors concerned traffic and pedestrian safety. This issue had also been one of many raised by the police. Some of the councillors who seemed in favour of the proposal asked whether any objections from statutory consultees had been received. The answer to this in black and white was no.

The real answer was that the fire services had chosen to abstain from giving an opinion, and that the police had raised at least half a dozen serious safety/policing concerns. Not saying ‘No’ is not the same as giving approval. Also, the Council document prepared for the hearing stated that MSP Brian Adams had given the project his blessing. For some reason, this document did not mention that MSP Richard Baker had written in opposition to the plan, or that MP Anne Begg had forwarded correspondence from her constituents against it.

The RSPB was not a statutory consultee. It wrote to me – which I quoted at the meeting – to say that from an early stage it had been against the Loirston site’s selection. They used the phrases in writing to me that “no real mitigation was possible” and that “no sensible person” could favour building this stadium on Loirston.

How was this summarised in the Environmental Statement (which taxpayers seem to have contributed to – the Council spent £180K so far on investigating the stadium)? The RSPB position was summarised as ‘not to build too close to the Loch’. Ms Dean as convener did not seek to clarify how such a disparity could occur. Nor did she seek to investigate how the environmental council expert and the environment survey said that there would be no significant air pollution risks. My speech to the hearing referred to the City’s own data which clearly say that Wellington Road already has air pollution problems. I asked how getting 21,000 people into 1400 car parking spaces and using 80 buses (the applicant’s estimate of how many buses would be needed) down to the site would result in no increase in pollution. Ms Dean did not express any interest.

Ms Dean described her experience at the Thistle. She said she was there, and a man near her ‘nearly put his hand up’

On the subject of danger to pedestrians on Wellington Road, Ms Dean asked the objector ‘What is the difference between Wellington Road and King Street – current home of Aberdeen FC?’ The objector was able to explain the obvious difference in terms of speed limits, road type and presence of HGVs on Wellington Road.

Three community councils jointly held a meeting the previous evening at the Thistle Hotel, Altens. Everyone was welcome; it was standing room only. (See Aberdeen voice article published 14th Jan. )

When a show of hands for or against the proposal was asked for, virtually all present voted against it. When this was brought up at the hearing, Ms Dean described her experience at the Thistle. She said she was there, and a man near her ‘nearly put his hand up’. She said that he seemed to be afraid to do so, and ‘only half put his hand up’. Dean also felt that there were probably a few more present that likewise felt afraid to vote in favour of the stadium.

I cannot quote her verbatim on this point – but the objective, impartial convener clearly concluded that people were for the stadium in her mind, but afraid to say so. So – a meeting room filled with hundreds of residents might have had one or two people afraid for some reason to vote in favour – this obviously still shows the majority were against it. Whether or not you are for or against this proposal, does anyone think that a convener of an important hearing should add her personal conclusions as to how someone might or might not have wanted to vote, which coincidentally favours her perceived bias?

charleston-p1-p2-trip-to-lochinch-march-2010

This meeting had many eye-openers.

I for one had taken it for granted that Pittodrie could not possibly have been remodelled or improved: the papers said it, and I made the mistake of believing it.

One of the 23 opponents gave an excellent speech stating how Norwich FC managed to improve its facilities one side at a time. Why Pittodrie can’t do the same was back as a legitimate question – no one had an answer for it.

Amusingly, along with 80 buses to be supplied by First Bus to whisk people to Loirston, we are apparently given some sketchy parking options – Businesses in Altens take note: approximately half of the 1400 spaces are promised to club officials and employees. Since there is not sufficient car parking on the actual site, the plan seems to now include either making Cove and Altens open season for parking and making residents buy parking permits, then having parking spaces for rent at the oil industry sites and sites of other users of Altens Industrial estate.

I do not know how the oil companies will react, but considering the commercial and strategic value of their property, I doubt having concert goers and football fans coming and going at all hours of the weekend will be seen as a security bonus. No obvious risks to the oil companies there then – just hundreds of happy, well behaved people parking at all hours of the nights and weekends on normally secured oil industry premises.

Yes, I personally don’t want the stadium on Loirston: I intend to profit instead by having owls, buzzards, osprey, various other birds, protected species such as otters and bats, badgers and wild plants including orchids flourish there instead. The question is where do your elected representatives sit? If they are not representing you, then perhaps it is time to get new representatives.

The press is meant to be ‘the fourth estate’ – an impartial witness to what goes on in the branches of government and business. I have admitted I am partial – but I’ve read both sides and made a conclusion not based on what I can gain from it financially or otherwise.

Did the P&J tell you this development is planned for legally protected greenbelt land?

Did the P&J explain how crowded the Thistle Hotel , Altens meeting was with virtually no supporters for the plan?

Did the article mention the wildlife that depends on the site for food?

Not a bit.

It’s editorial page was only slightly more openly in favour than the ‘articles’ – it accused opponents of the AFC scheme of ‘nimbyism’ – i.e. ‘not in my back yard’ as the reason for the objections.

Those of us at the hearing (and I didn’t see a single person in favour of the development at the hearing in the public gallery of the 20+ people present) do not want the greenbelt destroyed – which is a far cry from ‘nimbyism’. But when have the P&J let facts get in the way of a good story or indeed of revenue.

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