Oct 232013
 

The dust has settled on the City of Culture Bid, Round One; Aberdeen did not make the shortlist. Dundee however is through to Round Two. Following a review of bid material, recent events and a visit to Dundee, Suzanne Kelly compares the two cities and offers a few observations.

Netherkirkgate

Netherkirkgate, Dundee. Photo by Julie Thompson

It was meant to be so simple to win the City of Culture bid and it was meant to be another feather in the cap of Valerie Watt, Aberdeen City Council’s Chief Executive.
She’d been at the helm when Derry won the right to be City of Culture 2013.
For the Aberdeen bid, the usual city council suspects were called in and a number of arts and culture names and experts were signed up to create our submission.

Rita Stephen, sometime secondee to ACSEF, past promoter of the City Garden Project, etc, was seen as the safe pair of hands for this task.

Perhaps this appointment is why the bid often hones in on business retention and economic issues, with ACSEF getting a mention or two. Aberdeen needed to produce a sharp, smart and creative bid.

The bid team had to demonstrate how the city nurtured talent, used existing assets and involved people. It had to demonstrate that it could come up with interesting new ideas.

High Street

Seeing as we’re not particularly good at any of these things compared to other cities, the bid was never going to survive round one.

So, how can a city down the road from us, without lots of oil money greasing its wheels, without its own ACSEF, and without a dominant uber-wealthy ruling class outperform Aberdeen?

How did we wind up with the bid submission we produced?

How does our city stack up in the culture stakes against our poor relations in the south?

Would the lusted-after Granite Web in our city centre green space have wowed the judges?

And what was wrong about Aberdeen’s proposed Gigs on Rigs?

Two bids

Dundee’s bid actively seeks input from its citizens and groups. It is well-written with sound ideas based around the arts, people, and the environment. It is clear that rather than drawing up pie-in-the-sky concepts, it drew on its resources and existing practice.

The Dundee update webpage confirms the bid proposals, some of which require a bit more effort, but the proposals are not complete fabrication.  They have the arts and culture base because they nourish their arts.

‘”Communities around the Tay Estuary

• a celebration of the environment – connecting the cities green spaces, a festival of the hills in and around Dundee, its yellow flag beach and an outdoor music programme;

• a celebration of our people – a homecoming for those with their roots in Dundee or those who studied in the City;

• a celebration of the light – shining a light on the future, appreciating the quality of light, a night light luminaire and bright minds.”

In terms of consultation, Dundee still want to hear from people with good ideas:- 

…send us ideas for inclusion in the programme.  We have limited space in the bid so we won’t be able to include everything, but we want to hear as many ideas as possible”

To consult with people, Aberdeen took over the premises of what had been an independent music retailer, One Up. One Up had been forced to close, and in its day it contributed to our culture in showcasing local and larger acts and carrying local records. Having its husk used for the City’s vehicle of what culture should be felt a bit odd.

City Square, Dundee (2). Photo by Julie ThompsonIndividuals were invited to write ideas on Post-It notes in the bid centre/One Up. I did, and there were many good ideas.

There were also notes in pure council speak; such buzzwords as vibrant, dynamic, connectivity and transformational were much in evidence.

If these words did have any power or real meaning, their overuse in every City Council report for decades in Aberdeen has reduced them to meaningless jargon.

Predictably, the culture that was put on offer excluded anything remotely controversial, avant guard, or alternative. This was going to be a corporate, conservative cultural exercise.

As to Aberdeen’s final bid submission, ‘transparency’ was lacking, even to some of those who were supposed to be writing it.

A man who asked staff for a copy of the submission at the bid centre was asked, “And who are you exactly?” He couldn’t get a copy at the City of Culture bid centre. Perhaps this was not the ideal way to win support.

Communicating with Rita Stephen and the FOI office afterwards for a copy should have resulted in the bid being emailed swiftly. In the event, it took several requests to get a copy. The first version received was redacted (ie some text was blacked out for secrecy). We’re used to this in Aberdeen.

Most worryingly, it seems only a very few people had a say in how the bid submission would be carried out or what was going into it, and it is not clear if those in charge consulted widely enough with experienced arts and culture experts before the bid was submitted. What local artists, musicians, venue owners were asked for opinions? Who wrote the submission and who read it afterwards?

Various one-off, specially commissioned events took place during the lauch run-up. Despite the Lord Provost’s speech at an open photography exhibition in the gallery in which he stated that this would be a year of culture with or without bid success, the signs are this promise is fizzling out quickly.

This photography show at One Up / the Bid office exhibited some good work, but there were far too many photos displayed too closely together.  Hundreds of 3” x 5” images, only inches apart, competed for attention. A roughly-constructed installation piece with sound inside didn’t exactly fire the imagination.

Two Environments

HMS UnicornDundee loves its waterfront featuring HMS Discovery.

It loves the lesser-known Unicorn, a beautiful, preserved frigate open for tourism and events.

The city holds events on and around the waterfront.

Its town centre nightlife seems to lack as much severe public drunkenness as dominates nights here, although it does exist, as it does in any other city.

It respects its green park. The river is for walking along, stopping at Discovery or Unicorn, or popping into a hotel bar.

A new leisure complex has been erected on a site which is being revamped. The V&A will soon be on the riverside, creating real arts jobs where the old leisure centre stood. This is regeneration.

Aberdeen chooses to ignore the leisure potential of Nigg Bay, for instance, and financially-motivated expansionists want to allow the industrial harbour to take over this important unspoilt recreational site.

What that would mean to the life – wild, aquatic and human – in Torry in health terms can’t be good. Nigg Bay has two SSSIs, not that this otherwise important environmental protection matters in Aberdeen or Aberdeenshire, as witnessed by Trump’s Menie development.

East Grampian Coastal Partnership sensibly and reasonably proposed to construct a small leisure and learning marina, but this idea seems to have been cut adrift.  North of the industrial harbour, which by some coincidence has two of Scotland’s most polluted roads – Market Street, and Wellington Road – adjacent, is the Fun Beach.

Admittedly some good events do take place nearby, but where there was opportunity for interesting seaside bars, restaurants and hotels, identikit shopping malls exist instead. Many on the seafront have no views out to sea, a waste of waterfront opportunity.

Two Cultures

High Street - City CentreDundee loves the arts. Public sculptures abound, and whilst tourists don’t visit specifically for the bronze Desperate Dan, Minnie the Minx or the wonderful dragon, these public artworks are appreciated, photographed and posed with.

The city centre was busy the weekend I visited. Many were tourists who’d come for the day. I was handed a flyer for a fashion/vintage show. A dignified, attractive, creative market was taking place.  Posters advertised bands and art events.

The best summary of what is already in place in Dundee comes from its bid literature:

  • The V&A@Dundee will generate over 300,000 visits per year and 200 jobs.
  • In 2012 there were 2,414,362 attendances recorded at cultural venues in the city.
  • In 2012 217,009 people attended festivals and events in Dundee.
  • Dundee is home to several independent creative collectives –Tin Roof Collective, Generator Project, WASPS, Vanilla Ink and Fleet Collective – with the aim of providing supportive space and resources for designers and artists.
  • Discovery, Scotland’s International Film Festival for young audiences was the joint recipient of an international award for youth cinema in 2012.
  • Dundee Rep is a leading Scottish cultural institution.  It comprises the only full-time repertory theatre company in the UK, Scotland’s contemporary dance company and a cutting-edge community learning team.
  • Scottish Dance Theatre tours internationally as cultural ambassadors from Scotland.
  • Leisure & Culture Dundee was Scotland’s first charitable incorporated organisation to bring together a portfolio of culture, heritage, library and sporting resources into one charitable organisation.
  • Creative Dundee has hosted global event night, Pecha Kucha Night events quarterly, since bringing them to the city in November 2011.  The speed-presenting format has a 200-strong audience attend each event and has had over 80 local, national and international presenters talk.
  • In 2013 Dundee City Libraries won the UK Bookseller of the Year award for public libraries.
  • The Mills Observatory is the only full-time municipal observatory in the UK.
  • Broughty Ferry Castle is managed in partnership with Historic Scotland, is an icon at the mouth of the Tay with a dramatic and bloody history.
  • Caird Hall is one of Scotland’s most popular city centre conference and cultural venues.
  • The award winning McManus: Dundee’s Art Gallery and Museum collections of fine decorative art and whaling artefacts have been designated collections of national importance.
  • Duncan of Jordanstone College of Art & Design has an international reputation for being at the forefront of contemporary research in art and design.

The Duncan of Jordanstone arts campus is a short walk both to the town centre, and the river, Gray’s School of Art  is a ten minute minimum bus ride away from our city centre.

Aberdeen has a great gallery with some outstanding work and exhibitions and we are fortunate that the annual National Gallery Portrait Awards tour stops here. The Arts Centre also plays host to a number of events and smaller groups and artists.

McManus GalleriesHowever, the city’s treatment of local arts groups in the recent past is nothing to be proud of.

News does travel through the arts community, and Aberdeen has some damage control to do.

The Granite City has at least one bona fide billionaire who makes a big show of wanting things to improve, via building in a common good land garden rather than brownfield, whilst insisting the geographic centre must be the sole focal point.

The world’s great cultural centres, including Rome, Paris and New York do not share this myopia (nor do Edinburgh, Glasgow and Dundee).

Sadly, when it came to saving the small, independent Limousine Bull Arts collective, none of our well-meaning patrons could find their chequebooks. This modest collective brought art exhibitions, training and studio space to Torry, a supposed priority area for improvement.

Past shows have included a dramatic historical exhibition on the effects on Aberdeen of the Second World War, a show of members’ work, and work created from some of their life drawing students. It brought people into Torry to talk about and enjoy art. The collective had to close its Torry premises due to lack of the sort of funds our city fathers might spend on a good weekend trip.

What can be said about Peacock Visual Arts and how it got so far with its vision for an arts centre, only to be subsumed in a monstrously out-of-scale City Square or Garden Project? The proposal for the Peacock centre wasn’t loved by all, but compared to subsequent ideas, the Peacock plan was the least disruptive, most affordable and most environmentally-sensitive of all.

Years earlier, the then Arts Council ring-fenced £1m or so for an arts project involving the Citadel. It was in no small part down to the then City Council’s lack of diligence that this never happened. The deadline came and went whilst the administration was inactive.

Perhaps the worst, most visible recent slap in the face for arts, culture and charity was the closure of the worthwhile, creative venture, the Foyer.

City Square Market, DundeeAll manner of good work took place here, from helping people conquer their problems to encouraging fledgling artists to hold exhibitions of their work in the restaurant.

Why couldn’t we save the Foyer?

Why couldn’t public and private money be found?

Why has nothing else come along to do the necessary work it did?

The administration, Valerie Watts and Rita Stephen, who seems to have had a large hand in preparing the bid, seem unaware that these lost opportunities, thwarted arts groups and other initiatives could have been the very foundation for an independent arts scene. The council runs arts courses and arts events.

Does it have some kind of issue with supporting non state-sponsored or patronised artist and art groups? You could be forgiven for thinking so.

For real progress, and for creativity and community culture and art to grow, the city administration might want to consider loosening its controlling, conservative hold, whilst providing reasonable, accountable financial support. In less-controlling, insular areas, you’ll find arts and cultural activity taking place without having to have a government logo stamped on every ticket and every programme.

Two Visions

Magdalen GreenDundee is encouraging people to use its many facilities, to create, to spend time in its existing contemporary arts centre.

It has a large open green space with a pavilion at the end of the Tay. No-one is seeking to destroy it and no one is complaining it is under-used.

It is a park. It is a green, healthy space. It is there for when it’s needed for relaxation or for events.

Dundee’s jute, jam and journalism tradition has evolved, and past, present and future are all valued here. The events proposed, the venues existing and the forthcoming V&A will enhance what is already there and encourage more visitors.

With its great reserves of personal wealth, helped here and there by offshore tax haven use and abuse, Aberdeen seems to have a considerable gap between the have-nots and the have-yachts.

Arts and music education for school children were cut by the previous administration. We have a mentality here, personified in some of our most successful – financially speaking – residents,  that the purpose of education is to learn how to do a job servicing the oil industry. Humanities and arts are not as much a priority here as in Edinburgh, Glasgow, and of course Dundee.

This attitude towards culture and the arts is reflected throughout most of Aberdeen.

The bill of goods we’re being hard-sold is that to fix our retail and city centre social problems, we have to build something in the only green common good land we have.  No-one seems willing to rejuvenate our considerable brownfield sites, where potential exists for positive social and cultural improvement, or encourage use of the closed Union Street shops.

Money rules here, but that is not always translated to the makers, artists, creators and arts educators in the private sector.  Those teachers, small bars, clubs, galleries, art collectives which do exist, deserve our sincere thanks and our funding.

Victoria Docks, Dundee. Photo by Julie ThompsonWhere Dundee has a host of well-thought through proposals, we had a no doubt well-meaning art student draw attention to our bid by painting himself a different colour every day and sitting in the window of a former indy record shop. Rita, or someone on her team, invented the proposed Gigs on Rigs.

With the hallmarks of an idea scrawled on the back of an envelope after a taxpayer-funded expensive four course dinner, this was never, ever going to work.

The idea was to fly bands to North Sea oil rigs, and beam the live shows back to Aberdeen, where we would pay to attend venues to watch bands play from the rigs. No-one seems to have looked into security, safety, or how bands would feel about this. I haven’t met a musician yet who’d prefer to jump in a helicopter to travel to an alcohol-free, freezing outdoor rig rather than play in a lively town and go out afterwards.

No-one seems to have thought through why people would want to pay to watch remote gigs, how much it would cost, who would prefer a survival suit and a helicopter ride to a limo filled with champagne, and so on. The unpredictable weather that often delays flights to rigs is well known in the industry – what would have happened if an act couldn’t get to a rig to perform? But ‘gigs on rigs’ sounded good at the time, no doubt.

Good Luck Dundee

I am rooting for Dundee; it would be fitting if its bid does well. Their ideas are sound, their encouragement and support for independent creatives is genuine and long-running. Their regeneration of brownfield is admirable.

If we are to have the ‘smart, successful Scotland’ that Scottish Enterprise and other quangos claim to want in their jargon-filled reports, perhaps it’s time to stop this inter-city tribal competitive capitalism, and instead to realise that all our cities need to be encouraged and helped, not made to compete between themselves.

Let’s all wish Dundee good luck, and let’s hope the local myopic, formulaic, conservative art mentality and Philistine environmental attitudes of our mandarins and city fathers may improve from watching what our close neighbour does.

Go Dundee!

Dundee’s update: http://www.wedundee.com/downloads/Dundee_CoC_Toolkit.pdf

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Oct 152013
 

Following on from Timothy Neat’s Edinburgh Festival appearance at Summerhall, profiling his collaborations with John Berger, Peacock Visual Arts are proud to be hosting a major Retrospective of Neat’s life’s work, STANDS SCOTLAND WHERE SHE DID? from 27 September – 9 November 2013.

Martha Mackenzie, Scots Traveller, Fortinghall, November 1976 © Timothy Neat sq

Martha Mackenzie, Scots Traveller, Fortinghall, November 1976 © Timothy Neat

A stunning collection of photographs capturing experiences and relationships over a long life will be on show. Neat is a champion of the marginalized – Scottish Travelling People, Gaelic bards, salmon-netters, crofters, bee-keepers, horse breeders, Andalucian villagers, poets and artists.

Neat has worked closely with many leading Scottish figures – MacDiarmid, Sorley MacLean, Hamish Henderson, Ian Hamilton Finlay, Margaret Gardiner (Pier Arts Centre, Orkney) and the Fife singer Jean Redpath.

Also, Robert Burns and Charles Rennie Mackintosh!

Six of Neat’s films will be screened at The Belmont Picturehouse including:

Play me Something (1988), winner of the Europa Prize, Barcelona 1989. This 35mm feature film shot on the Isle of Barra and Venice, features John Berger, Tilda Swinton, Hamish Henderson and Liz Lochhead;

Journey to a Kingdom – Hamish Henderson returns to the North East of Scotland’ (1992).

(Hamish Henderson [1919-2002] was with the 51st Highland Division in North Africa and Italy and became a legendary figure amongst the Gordon Highlanders. This film originally made for Grampian Television documents Henderson’s work as a folklorist in the North East. Neat’s highly prasied two-volume biography of Henderson will be available after the film screening).

STAND SCOTLAND WHERE SHE DID? will be a major exhibition, featuring a new suite of screen-prints by Neat, published by Peacock Visual Arts, and original works by many of the major artists with whom he has collaborated over 50 years; years during which Scottish culture and politics have changed dramatically.

Guests attending the opening and closing events will have the opportunity to enjoy performances by some of Scotland’s best traditional musicians.

Alison McMorland and Geordie McIntyre will sing Hamish Henderson ballads and political songs at the opening on 27 September. On 9 November Elizabeth Stewart will sing some of the great ballads of the north east and Alastair Roberts, rising star of the modern folk scene in Scotland, will sing some of Neat’s own songs.

Peacock Visual Arts is proud to be able to present this Retrospective in Aberdeen, before various parts of the exhibition embark on an international tour, which may prove seminal during the year of the Scottish National Referendum.

To coincide with this Retrospective, Polygon (Edinburgh) has published a major book, ‘These Faces; photographs and drawings by Timothy Neat’, with an important introduction by John Berger.

FULL LIST OF EVENTS

Exhibition:

28 September – 9 November 2013

Exhibition Opening:

Friday 27 September, 6 – 8pm
With performances by Alison McMorland and Geordie McIntyre.

Film Screenings:

Sunday 29 September, from 6pm:

‘Journey to a Kingdom’ (52mins)
‘The Tree of Liberty’ (73mins)

Sunday 13 October, from 6pm:

‘Time is a Country’ (52mins)
‘Hallaig’ (64mins)

Sunday 27 October, from 6pm:

‘Rathad nan Ceard’ (30mins)
‘Play me Something’ (72mins)

Exhibition Closing Gig:

Friday 8 November, 7pm
Performances by Elizabeth Stewart and Alastair Roberts.

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Oct 142013
 

WOSWBanner2With thanks to Keith Byres .

For one weekend only, artists at Langstane Place will open their doors and showcase a wide variety of work including:  drawing, painting, photography, textiles, glass and installation.

Wasps Studios provide studio space for artists and makers across Scotland.

During the month of October 2013 we will be opening our studio spaces to the public and inviting you to come inside, meet artists in their working spaces and talk to them directly about their work.

Wasps Studios are at 36-48 Langstane Place, Aberdeen  AB11 6FB.

For more information about participating artists, venues and additional activities, please visit waspsstudios.org.uk

Oct 042013
 

An Optimistic Sound – The Songs of Michael Marra, Dundee Repertory Theatre, 28 September 2013. David Innes reviews.

marra-pic

It’s difficult to believe that almost a year has passed since Michael Marra was taken from us, and the world was deprived of a supremely talented writer, artist and performer.

The affection and respect which poured out from fellow artists, fans and friends in October 2012 validated his status and the esteem in which he was held.

Such was this esteem that Celtic Connections, only three months after his death, featured an evening of celebration of his music and influence entitled All Will Be Well.

Quite what he would have made of this we can only guess; but as a fiercely proud Dundonian writer and performer, one can imagine that a further commemoration, An Optimistic Sound, played to a sold-out Dundee Repertory Theatre, would be the finest accolade that he could imagine.

Whilst the Glasgow Royal Concert Hall event was emotional and celebratory, by contrast the Dundee event had a more relaxed feel. It was as if Michael’s ‘bairns’ The Hazey Janes, with son Matthew on bass and daughter Alice compering and performing, and wife Peggy, had invited friends round for the evening to sing a few songs and share an anecdote or two.

That spirit of inclusion extended to the audience, loudly appreciative of every artistic effort extended for our entertainment.

Whether it was Rod Paterson telling of Michael’s generosity in completing a muse-deserted Paterson song overnight, Peter McGlone blowing heart-rending saxophone, or Saint Andrew declaiming Woodwork Woodwork  and revealing that its refrain was based on the late Gus Foy’s school timetable, standards of performance never fell below outstanding.

Could Muscle Shoals have assembled a more soulful backing chorus for Eddi Reader’s white-hot Here Come The Weak than Alice Marra, Karine Polwart and sisters Fiona, Gillie and Eilidh Mackenzie?

Dougie McLean has thankfully preserved a song, never recorded, which Michael would sing in his early performing days at Blairgowrie Folk Club, and took obvious delight in performing it.

These are merely a few highlights among many. The whole was indeed greater than the sum of its parts.

Michael had always shied away from stardom. As our national Makar Liz Lochhead reminded us, he once said, ‘I don’t want my name in lights; I want my name in brackets’. Ever the songwriter. His generosity was well-known and he would have been proud, without doubt, that all profits from the evening are to go to Optimistic Sound, a Michael Marra Memorial Music Trust for the young people of Dundee.

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Sep 272013
 

Voice’s Old Susannah takes a look over the past week’s events in the ‘Deen and beyond. By Suzanne Kelly.

Dictionary

Tally ho! Has the Deen ever seen a fairer summer? It’s not faded out just yet, and the parks are still full of people. Union Terrace Gardens were full of revellers for the Rainbow festival.
The mythical drunks and junkies said to loiter there are as much in evidence as the transparent giant boy who floated over the lurid flowerbed in the Granite Web drawings.

Hazlehead is filled with people, including motorists who don’t give a damn about parking on the grass, as well as thieves who’ve stolen a metal plaque.

More on this and other thefts shortly.

Gerry Jablonski & The Electric Band had a great night last Friday at the Lemon Tree; Techfest has rolled into town with a 20th anniversary birthday party and a programme of events that couldn’t be broader. 

I hope to make it to the talk in Cruickshank botanical gardens on Friday. There was a talk about what to do if there is a zombie apocalypse; I missed this, but it couldn’t have been that much difference from some of the previous administration’s full council meetings.

Alas! I wasn’t quick enough to get one of the limited planetarium tickets, and because of other commitments I had to miss BrewDog’s ‘Science of Brewing’ talk which took place Tuesday.

I consoled myself considerably when I discovered two of BrewDog’s new offerings. A new light beer ‘How to Disappear Completely’ is filled with flavour yet low in alcohol content.  Then there is  ‘Misspent Youth.’  The bar staff told me it was rich, creamy and tasted of coffee and plums. They were right. I’ll be back for more of each soonest.

Alas!  Everything that’s not nailed down, everything that is nailed down, and even the nails are being stolen in City and Shire. The epidemic of thefts all around us is alarming. If the police are recovering stolen goods, I hope they let us know about it, for the news at present is all about the thefts. Metal drain and gutter  covers are going faster than cut-price cider.

Cars are being stolen at a rate exceeding sales of the new Grand Theft Auto V game. One car was stolen twice in the space of a few hours; you’ve got to give those thieves points for daring.

Your more ambitious thief is ripping their employer off, be it restaurant, the council or oil company.  People in supermarkets are treating self check-out lines as optional. People are stealing pets in broad daylight. Your more intellectual thief is plagiarising poetry, and having the nerve to win poetry contests.  Award-stealing poet Allen has had to return a prize; he was caught stealing other poets’ material.  The BBC quotes Allen as saying :-

 “I accept that I did plagiarise certain poems (although it was genuinely not my intention to deceive)”

It’s OK then – he was only stealing, not trying to fool us.  Phew.  Here’s a poem for him:-

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue
I Think You’re A Tea-leaf

Och Aye Tha Noo. (copyright 2013 Old Susannah)

we all know what great places care homes are

Here in Torry, people have stolen not only drain covers but bricks – and a section of a stone wall. Worse, serial fantacist and idea appropriator Jeffrey Archer has a new book out to boot.

What’s going on? Why is it going unchecked? Who stole the pen I was just using a minute ago? Time for some timely theft-related definitions, as well as one timely definition for good measure.

Old Fashioned Policing: (old-fashioned English phrase) to keep the peace by intimidation and physical force.

Ah, the good old days. There was of course never any crime or social problem in the past, because in those halcyon days, police were not adverse to beating the daylights out of people, or scaring them out of their wits. Ah, the good old days eh?

I was surprised to read the tale of Ross-shire policemen Ovenstone and Kelman, who are in a  bit of muck because of two teenage girls.

The policemen, both in their early 30s decided the girls needed a bit of old-fashioned policing for acting up at a care home.
http://www.north-star-news.co.uk/News/Ross-girls-threat-cops-sentenced-24092013.htm .

Now we all know what great places care homes are, and how every child that winds up in one is no good. Well, the kindly policemen decided to use some initiative. They handcuffed the teenagers, drove them to a remote farm, intimidated them, made them walk without shoes through manure.

Now, if you can remember back to your teenage years, think what it would have been like if two uniformed, weapon-carrying angry policemen handcuffed you and made you do things that were outside of the law. Yes, you would have been scared into becoming a model citizen. There was of course no chance that this harmless escapade would have caused any lasting psychological scars.

Kelman, was given credit in court for bravely saying ‘that’s enough’

Sadly, the courts have taken action against the police.  Shocking, isn’t it. Of course there will be no custodial sentence, because that would serve no purpose. And here Old Susannah was, thinking that the deprivation caused by a jail term, and the message this sent out had some value.

No doubt this logic will be applied in the future to those with and without uniforms equally.

One of the braver cops, Kelman, was given credit in court for bravely saying ‘that’s enough’ at the end of the ordeal. I think he should get a medal. He didn’t stop anything; he was there, but he said ‘that’s enough’. Again, perhaps this logic will extend to those who are accessories to crime. For reasons unknown, Ovenstone decided to leave the police.

No, you just don’t get policing like that any more.

Theft – Pretexting: (Modern English phrase) – to gain entry to premises, to con, to deceive with the intent of stealing.

Hard up for cash? Need a little extra spending money? Why not do what Charles Skinner did, and trick your way into an 80 year-old woman’s house?

Pretend you’re there to do some work (as if you did any work), read an electricity meter, whatever. If your victim’s been dumb enough to let you in the front door, then they kind of deserve to be robbed, don’t they?

An Aberdeen pensioner is now having problems sleeping after Skint Skinner did just this to her, and once in her home stole money from her handbag.

Old people will have lots of money after all, and sometimes they forget they have it (like the hospital patients you hear of now and then that are ripped off by their ‘carers’.  In fact there have been a few thefts recently in the ARI – gold chains, money, etc.; I’m sure this won’t be upsetting to patients and their families in the least.

thieves stole a commemmorative plaque from Hazelhead park

After all, you probably have a good use for the money – like your drug habit. What fun is an old person going to have with their cash anyway? If they wind up injured or emotionally upset, that’s not really your problem is it?

Besides, if you have had a tough childhood, a drug or alcohol problem, then it’s not your fault, and a decent lawyer will get you a reduced sentence, probably with the taxpayer paying.

Yes, pretexting your way into someone’s house can be a nice little earner.

Metal theft: (Modern English phrase) The theft of goods for their metal/mineral content and/or the stripping of metal from property.

Times are indeed tough; the value of metal is shooting through the roof (no doubt the roof’s lead has been stolen from the roof by now). Time to get some tools, a truck, and go nick some metal.

As mentioned, thieves stole a commemmorative plaque from Hazelhead park. Well, if the park is for everyone’s enjoyment, why not theirs?

Rail commutes will have notice no less than 4 recent disruptions on the Aberdeen to Inverness line:  thieves have been stealing the cabling used in the signalling system. To lose copper cables to thieves once is unlucky. To lose your cables a second time is a bit careless. To have your copper stolen a third time begs the question ‘are you paying attention?’ 

Somewhere there are scrap metal dealers who are taking this material in

To lose cabling a fourth time implies incompetence. As to the thieves, well, the cabling is just there for the taking apparently. What’s the worst that could happen anyway? A potential train crash can’t outweigh the need to steal some copper wire.

Somewhere there are scrap metal dealers who are taking this material in. There must be a few clues when people go to sell plaques that are inscribed to the people of a city, or miles of copper wire. But none of these metal yards seem to be coming forward.

ATM Theft: (Modern English Phrase) to steal cash dispensers.

In the old days, the ones cops like Kelman and Ovenstone might have yearned for, a thief would just have waited for an unsuspecting person to use an ATM, and then either make note of their card number, and steal the card later – or just beat the cash withdrawer senseless once they had the money in their hand. These days are gone.

Need to supplement your metal theft income? Get a truck round to an ATM, and just steal the whole thing. In this line of work you get to travel as well – New Deer, Bieldside, Inverurie. Sounds pretty good to me.

Auto Theft: (English Phrase) the theft of a vehicle.

Well, the police do have this covered nicely in our area. Of course cars are stolen, driven  in a stylish stuntman manner, and then often set alight, in one case cheering up some shoppers at a supermarket not long ago.

The police are blaming car owners for keeping car keys in their kitchens.

Car thieves taught admirers and young apprentices how to hotwire cars

Granted, you have to lock your homes and your cars these days. But even if you do this, if the keys are in your locked house somewhere they can be found, then it seems you’re pretty much guilty of being an accessory to any resultant theft.

We did have the exciting Stig Aberdeen Boys Facebook page not long ago; it had hundreds of members.

Car thieves taught admirers and young apprentices how to hotwire cars, how to steal motorbikes and so on. It’s a shame it was taken down, but Facebook decided promoting crime wasn’t something it wanted to branch out into. Shame.

There is No Honour Among Thieves: (English saying) A proverb advising that thieves are not to be trusted.

Well, it does my heart good to say there is always the exception that proves the rule. In a recent court appearance, a noble, brave robber (who had assaulted and threatened his victims and acted as part of a team) has refused to name his co-workers.

The man in question did tell the court he was very sorry indeed for upsetting people and taking their money, but ‘he is the only one going to jail’ for the spate of robberies he and his mates committed. I’d love to tell you his name, but someone seems to have stolen my notes.

For reasons of space, I’ll leave it there. There have been people embezzling from public and private sector employers; people stealing from charities, people stealing from the old and the infirm.

In Torry people have stolen bricks and even a bit of a stone wall. It just goes to show you, when you need to earn some money, there is always a way. (Did I ever tell you about the rich property developer who did a deal with the City over land in Kingswells, and then tried to keep £1.7 million pounds’ worth of profit)?

PS – pet theft is most definitely going on. Be vigilant.

Next week:  more definitions.

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Sep 272013
 

‘I want to be there, there being no top of tree, no glory or honour, simply working good and well, and producing stuff that will last the ages.’ (William Lamb, 1923)

As a young lad growing up in Montrose in the 1960s I first came across William Lamb’s work when my uncle used his old studio. Surrounded by statues of massive figures, disembodied heads and nude young boys, the place had a strange, neglected atmosphere. These days, his large bronze figures are proudly displayed in the town and the studio is open to the public.  John Stansfeld’s new biography can only add to the reputation of an important artist, often described as ‘a Scottish Rodin’. Graham Stephen reviews.

People's-Sculptor3Lavishly illustrated, the book details Lamb’s artistic achievements and gives us insight to a complex man who, despite a reluctance to leave his beloved home town, once solo-cycled over 4000km through Europe on his trusty Raleigh, had a trial for Aberdeen FC and briefly became a playmate of the current queen.

From a variety of sources, most notably the Simms’ family archive, Stansfeld examines Lamb’s struggle to create superb work despite personal hardships.

Rooted in his community and landscape, Lamb chose to ‘starve among (his) own folk’ rather than dilute his native culture by moving away in search of a more lucrative market.

His portrayal of working men and women, real people often struggling with life and the elements, are a particular feature of his work.

The Lamb who enlisted in 1915 was a skilled stonemason, respected artist and all-round sportsman. He returned a broken man, temporarily struck dumb, physically and psychologically devastated and, tragically, with a permanently damaged right hand.

By sheer force of will he taught himself to work again with his left, skilled enough to win commissions to create the war memorials which funded his European travels in 1923. His surviving letters from this trip are one of the highlights of the book, an insight into a man with a meticulous eye for detail, realising that art would be his life, never taking the easy path.

Stansfeld’s detailed research unearths intriguing aspects of Lamb’s life. He was almost perpetually penniless, relying on friends to feed him, often on a daily basis. Any money he made was invariably used to fund materials, or help fellow artists like Ed Baird, another undervalued Montrose talent.

The local council, disturbed by his nude figures, suggested adding kilts for a major exhibition, and Lamb reacted predictably. He was a lifelong teetotaller, disgusted by his alcoholic father, supressing his probable homosexuality, living alone in a freezing attic. His attendance at fledgling Nationalist meetings held by poet Hugh MacDiarmid in the 1920s was more likely for the heat of the fire than for the rhetoric.

Lamb later took his revenge on the arrogant MacDiarmid by making his bust look ‘like him’.

Most intriguing is his commission to sculpt Princess Elizabeth in 1932 when he spends many hours alone with the future queen, playing house and crafting plasticine tea-sets, before returning to Montrose, and his ultimate decline.

In a rare speech in 1930 William Lamb described Scottish sculpture as ‘hopeless’, unappreciated and unloved by the majority of the population. Even today it would be hard to argue against him. This fine book should help to bring his achievements to a wider audience.

The People’s Sculptor: The Life and Art of William Lamb (1893-1951)
John Stansfeld
Birlinn Ltd
£14.99

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Aug 012013
 

With thanks to Kirsty Young.

Artists in Print: 21 Years of Collaboration celebrates the wealth of prints made, in collaboration with numerous acclaimed artists over the last 21 years, by Peacock’s own master printmaker, Michael Waight.
Over 30 prints by prolific artists such as John Bellany, John Byrne, Ian McCulloch, Toby Paterson, Barbara Rae, Peter Randall-Page, Ralph Steadman, Frances Walker, Sylvia Wishart, Donald Urquhart, plus many more, will be shown together for the first time in this exciting exhibition.

Michael Waight has curated this show to give printmaking enthusiasts, fans of Peacock Visual Arts and the communities of Aberdeen a chance to see how he has spent the last twenty-one years in the Peacock workshop and in whose company.

The impressive list of artists included is by no means exhaustive – Mike having worked with over fifty artists on over three hundred editions and proofing projects.

To accompany the exhibition, Peacock Visual Arts will host a gallery tour and printmaking workshop, dates and details of which to be confirmed.

A gallery walk-around and informal talk with Michael will also be held at the gallery, to coincide with Impact 8 Conference (Dundee) and the Scottish Print Festival.

Michael Waight, Printmaker comments:

‘Putting this show together allows me and Peacock Visual Arts very publicly to acknowledge our thanks to every artist who has, and continues to, come our way. The artists are the brave and tolerant partners in these collaborations, entrusting ideas to us with faith and understanding that we can do justice to their vision.’

FEATURED ARTISTS 

John Bellany

John Bellany has inspired a new pride in Scottish artists; a fact duly recognised when he received the CBE.

His paintings are in the collections of major museums and art galleries throughout the world, including the National Galleries of Scotland, The Tate Gallery, The Museum of Modern Art, New York and the Metropolitan Museum, New York.

 

Adam Bridgland

Adam Bridgland (b. 1979) lives and works in London. He graduated with a Masters in Fine Art at the Royal College of Art in 2006 and has since exhibited widely in the UK, Europe, Asia and America. The BritishMuseum, the V&A, UBS, Boeing Asia and Debbie Harry are just some of the collectors of Adam’s work.  Described as ‘your favourite leisure time artist’, Adam embraces the everyday object finding inspiration from the colouring book image, travel guidebooks, and scout camping paraphernalia. Kitsch and humorous, yet equally poignant, Adam’s work rejoices in the mundane and is an investigation of the notion that holiday-making is just another ordinary everyday activity and that the holiday is essentially a fantasy that rarely lives up to our expectations.

 

James Furneaux (1935 – 2013)

James Furneaux was born in Aberdeen on 7th June 1935. In 1965 he became a lecturer at AberdeenCollege, where he taught art and design for 23 years, before taking early retirement in 1988 to concentrate on his own art.Furneaux was most noted for painting Aberdeen’s lesser known buildings and landmarks from unusual perspectives, and this early training in architecture was often apparent in his depiction of the city’s buildings.

 

Ralph Steadman

Ralph Steadman was born on 15 May 1936 in Wallasey, Liverpool.

He is renowned for his political and social caricatures and cartoons
and for illustrating a number of picture books, for which he received several
awards.

His work is sought after all over the world.

 

Exhibition Runs: 3 August – 14 September 2013
Opening Hours: Tuesday – Saturday 9:30 – 5:30pm
Entry: Free to exhibition. Charges will apply to events and workshops.

Jul 222013
 

So, now we’ve been told why Aberdeen wasn’t short-listed in its bid to be UK City of Culture 2017. No wow factor, no coherent vision, no passion… It’s a pity then that the judging panel weren’t seated in a roasting hot HMT to witness the Great Big Dance Show earlier this month, says Angela Joss.

Produced, for the second year, by our own Citymoves Dance Agency and funded by Get Scotland Dancing, this event showcased and celebrated the region’s dancing talent, from the professionals to those on a big stage for the first time; from the very young to the silver-haired; from the clearly accomplished to those dancing for the sheer joy of it.
Really, if something on the evening’s programme didn’t Get Scotland Dancing, then it was not for the lack of choice.

On a day when an unpleasant group had demonstrated in Castlegate to promote their view that multi-culturalism is dangerous, Scottish country, Bollywood  and Irish features co-existed harmoniously and Aberdonians and visitors alike were shown further proof that the SDL promote errant nonsense. 

In any case, judging by the peaceful counter-protest against the SDL’s intolerance, the dancers were preaching to the converted.

In a full 35-dance programme, which included tap and jazz, it would be unfair to pick out only a few highlights, although Quicksilver, with an average age of around 65 and with hair colour which one imagines gives them their name, delivered a moving and amusing Summer Gloves and Satin Sandals.

It centred on the act of ironing men’s shirts and segued into a tango with the garments until the audience could almost see the virtual partner inside. This inevitably brought to mind thoughts of widowhood and divorce, which will undoubtedly have touched the lives of at least some of those women.

In a similar vein, performances in previous years from Step Forward, an integrated group for people with and without learning difficulties, have always been life-affirming, for the dancers’ purity of enjoyment and downright joy in movement. The group’s rendition of Singing In The Rain was a brolly-twirling success, bringing a much-needed shower to freshen up the auditorium’s sultry atmosphere.

And there were boys! At last, we appear to be leaving a period of dance history where male dancers have been perceived as cissies. Perhaps Billy Elliot is more than a fine film and stage production and has influenced a freer-thinking generation.

HMT suddenly had a stage full of lads who delivered a creditable jazz performance followed by a rollicking hip-hop skirmish to the music of the Beastie Boys, Eric Prydz and PJ & Duncan.

If there has to be any criticism, then the show’s stated aim of including as many groups and dancing styles as possible made this, perhaps, an over-long evening, especially for little ones present, and the stifling heat didn’t improve matters.

However, it’s hard to see what could be left out, and an evening of such variety and inclusiveness sent the audience out into the night, buzzing and delighted, possibly thinking that we don’t need the validation of a judging panel to tell us that there’s some inspirational cultural activity going on, right here, right now.

Photos by Sid Scott, for Citymoves Dance Agency – 2013

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Jul 212013
 

The Aberdeen Antiques and Arts Centre has been established at 24 South College Street since 2005, yet many people know little or nothing of its existence. Now it’s offering opportunities for artists to showcase their work for display and sale. With thanks to Suzie Reid.

Hiding behind a small, rather unimposing front door you’ll find that the Aberdeen Antiques and Arts Centre is deceptively large.

It houses antiques and
collectables, books, furniture, art, jewellery, vintage clothing, vintage and retro artefacts, up-cycling and much more.

There’s something of interest for everyone who ventures through the Centre’s doors, with its many wee Aladdin’s caves and an upstairs loft.

Twenty two booths and numerous display cabinets are occupied and stocked by a number of local traders.

So, what are these opportunities?

The Centre is inviting local sculptors, photographers, painters and jewellery makers, in fact artists working in all media, to fill a display space with their work, offering publicity and a potential sales outlet. If you have good quality examples of your work, this could be an opportunity for the right buyer to find you. Staff at the Centre would like to meet you, right now. Are you interested?

Very soon, the BBC’s Antiques Roadtrip will be visiting to film another episode and it’s hoped that a small exhibition can be set up before the end of July. Although Centre staff realise that this is very short notice, they’re sure it will be well worth the effort.

After the cameras have gone, the plan is to continue utilising this space as an outlet for local art. It will be a place to give visibility to unknown but ambitious artistic talent and to help artists become known and sell their products.

If this sounds like something that interests you, why not pop down to The Arches and introduce yourself and your work? Alternatively, you can contact the Centre at

www.aberdeenantiques@btconnect.com

They would love to hear from you.

www.aberdeenantiquecentre.com

The centre is open from 11am to 4pm mon – Fri, and 10am to 5pm on a Saturday.

70s Clock

Image 1 of 9

Credit: Fred Wilkinson.

Jul 182013
 

Voice’s Old Susannah takes a look over the past week’s events in the ‘Deen and beyond. By Suzanne Kelly.

Balmy evenings, hot days, dolphins playing in Nigg Harbour; things are looking pretty good in the Deen for a place with such poor connectivity.  The Surf show of River Don photos has moved to 17 Belmont Street; at the opening Alicia Bruce gave an interesting talk, and some of the photographers discussed their work.

Art events, whether state-sponsored or not, are taking place despite the cultural bid being knocked out in an early round.   Artists converged on BrewDog earlier this week, with artists creating more wall art, and everyone given a chance to create their own artwork as well.
Photographer Sam Brill took some brill shots of the goings-on ( See pic below ).

It was almost as if artwork and spontaneity can happen without being planned and controlled by non-artists.

To celebrate getting a year older, I had a great night at Cafe 52, complete with a great group of people and the best chocolate cake I’ve ever had, which was made with stout – thank you Dorothy B.   I also had a lovely meal at Cafe Montmatre (the chocolate fondue dessert in particular was amazing); and some mysterious person sent champagne to my table as well, which went down very nicely indeed.  Thank you mysterious benefactor.

Education is in the forefront of the news this week.  School’s out for summer; schools are being merged, built, torn down and set fire to.

Graduating Uni students took their parents and friends to Union Terrace Gardens for photographs.
I suspect this is just to demonstrate the kind of hardships they’ve had to put up with while studying in the Deen, with its dark, dank scary park filled with deviants and druggies.

Many wonderful honorary degree candidates have been awarded diplomas as well; more on that later.

There are one or two coincidences in the news this week; one involves Aberdeen International Airport’s magazine, upBeat, sister to Trend magazine [what that?  Ed].  Its latest issue extols the virtues of our favourite golf course:-

“All golfing eyes are on Aberdeen with the advent of the Trump International Golf Course.  …the course has been voted both course of the year and the UK’s beset  practice ground, by Golf Odyssey, a leading golf travel magazine.  Looking ahead, the Trump resort will offer luxury accommodation in the Balmedie area, right on the coast.”

Isn’t that wonderful?  Awards, luxury, and no mention of any problems.

Coincidentally, the same issue of upBeat has a full page front inside colour advert.  Would you believe me if I told you this tasteful ad is for Trump’s Balmedie course?  Well, it is!  How very lucky to have the kind words appearing in the same issue as the ad.

This week’s definitions feature another coincidence and some university- and police-related definitions.

School Dinners: (mod English plural noun) cafeteria meals served to school children at meal times.

Known for their gourmet quality and popularity among children and school staff alike, I can truly say there is nothing like a school dinner.

In the news this week,  government is being pressured to make taking these delicious, healthy lunches absolutely mandatory.  The BBC reports that lobbyists want to ban packed lunches.  We can’t have too much freedom of choice, can we – makes things confusing.

Coincidentally, banning packed lunches and mandatory school dinners would be very profitable – for the Leon restaurant chain, which have been involved in a government-commissioned school food review.  Well, they weren’t going to come down in favour of children eating what they wanted or what their parents gave them, were they?

Sadly this attempt to gain further control by the state over children and parents is only in England so far.

I wonder which ConDem pals are behind this healthy option?

Since school meals are absolutely delicious and nutritious all the time, the little kids will be lapping this news up.  Still, it might be better if they could be force-fed, just to make sure they ate as they were told.

If some lucky restaurant/catering company gets a few pounds more from the recommendations they themselves made, so much the better. It’s not as if we’ve had any food scares.  And what could be better than a delicious British/English/Scottish/Welsh lunch at school?  Yum!

The small fly in the ointment (or in the spag bol sauce) might just be the little revelation that most of our institutions are serving chicken from… Thailand.

Sure this might not be the most ecologically sound choice in terms of carbon footprint.  It might not exactly be the best country in terms of animal welfare.  This fact might not exactly be good news to UK farmers.  But still, we’re saving money, even if  causing further animal suffering, ignoring our own economy, and making interesting transport choices in terms of pollution.

I wonder which ConDem pals are behind this healthy option?  Then again, it’s not a great amount, only 70% or so of chicken is coming from Thailand.  It’s not as if we’re serving horsemeat or contaminated beef to the little nippers, is it?

Honorary Degree: (Eng. compound noun) a citation/diploma bestowed by an educational institution on a person worthy of receiving such a qualification in light of their achievements in the world.

Someone named Annie Lennox got an honorary degree this week; she’s a singer who sticks her nose into issues such as Union Terrace Gardens (when we know only famous football managers are allowed to comment on the gardens’ future).  She’s also done lots of charity work, entertained people around the world, and campaigned on issues such as AIDS.

Bad luck Ms Lennox – you didn’t get a degree this time round from Robert Gordon University.  It instead decided the person to honour was: ex BP supremo, Tony Hayward.

Tony gratefully and humbly accepted this honour , presumably from Chancellor Ian Wood, for his 30 years in the oil business.  Less said about that little blip in the Gulf of Mexico, the better.

Of course Tony could have refused this degree, but why should he?

Haywire was in charge when the Deepwater Horizon incident happened.  People lost lives, lost husbands and dads, and it was very gruelling indeed for Tony.  He told the press he very much wanted his life back; it was all just a bit too demanding on his time.

Not so demanding though that he couldn’t go out sailing with Hay junior (presumably not in the Gulf of Mexico though).

RGU are being just a little bit modest in their awarding Tony this honour.  They say that once it was on the table, they had to go ahead and honour him.  Of course they did – when did RGU or Chancellor Sir Ian Wood ever go back on their word?  (Voice Competition – send in your lists of Ian involved in contradictory statements/actions – longest list wins a prize.  First hint to get you started – who said they would walk away if the public didn’t want the city gardens project?).

Of course Tony could have refused this degree, but why should he?  Aside from issues of accountability, lack of cooperation  with US investigators, denial, self-pity, or self-absorption, no reason I can think of.

Congratulations to Tony for joining other honourees including Donald Trump.  If the unthinkable happens, and RGU ever did anything unpalatable or unethical, Wayward could do as Dr Kennedy did, and return his degree.  More on the great man here, from Lena the Hyena  http://lenathehyena.wordpress.com/2013/07/13/i-would-love-my-life-back-the-honouring-of-tony-hayward/

Undoubtedly, this great honour to a great guy to celebrate him getting his life back (unlike the 11 souls which were killed, and the thousands of birds and sea creatures killed) is completely justified.

The best part of these RGU degrees is the example they set to the students.  Holding up Hayward and Trump as examples of what to aspire to, rewarding how they have proceeded through their careers, sends a clear message to students as to the importance of integrity, ethics, compassion and accountability.

Betting’s open for who will get an honorary RGU degree next year; favourite contenders are Ian Duncan Smith, Vlad the Impaler,  George Osbourne, or Roger Pearce of Special Branch.   “Who’s Pearce?” I hear you ask.  Well, here is a tale of our chief freedom fighter…

Justified: (noun) Necessitated, explainable, required.

Sometimes it’s worth taking a minute to realise how important it is that police spy on us.  Whatever they do, it’s for our own good.  Here’s to the men and women – although in this case mostly men – who go to great lengths to blend into dangerous subversive groups to keep our nation free from democracy – SORRY – I mean to say they keep our nation a free democracy.

Scattered around the country, there are a dozen or so young people who will eventually get mandatory school dinners justifiably thrust down their throats; they may wind up on great university courses where they will learn ethics by example such as RGU.  Their very existence is a shining testament to the vigorous vigilance, – and virility – of our brave, selfless undercover police.

This might seem outrageous, anti-democratic, exploitative of women

So thank you Roger Pearce of The Metropolitan Police’s Special Demonstration Squad, for running secret operations, keeping us safe in our beds.  In the case of a dozen women, it was more a case of getting them into bed, having sex with them, and fathering children – all under false pretences.

Those brave undercover cops got under the covers to keep you and I safe –  from middle class environmental protestors.

There can be no better example of how actions are justified than what Pearce told the BBC:-

 “The objective was to gather secret political intelligence. Many in the Met as a whole wouldn’t have known about it and even within the branch it was kept very, very secret for 40 years,”

“People felt very awkward about doing it. People thought of the parents of the children who had died. But against that was the sense of mission and work for the country.”

“Most [of the creepy two-faced bastards – sorry – police] had families who had to also bear this other life they were leading at strange times of the week – weekends and evenings – so it was tough for the officers and tough for their families too. But I think what drove them on to do it was that it was seen as the pinnacle of their careers,”  (Presumably their wives gave their consent for the police husbands to have unprotected sex with suspects and father children – how very giving of them – if they were consulted).

“on balance, distasteful in many ways though it was, set against the sense of mission and the sense that this was done for protection of national security, I believe it was justified“.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23256799
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-23224301

For ten years, Pearce signed off on operations where male officers took the identities of dead children (nb – the bereaved parents were thrilled to learn of this) in order to pretend to be protestors, spending years pretending to be friends, lovers, husbands.

This might seem outrageous, anti-democratic, exploitative of women if not actual sexual assault by sleazy narcissistic police officers, and so on.  But rest assured – Pearce believed it was all justified, so that’s pretty much all right then.

Not just anyone would be willing to spend years fooling those around them, even after realising the protestors in question were harmless, non-violent  average people who simply wanted to do their bit to protect the environment.

Not everyone would have had sex with women and got them pregnant to keep their cover.  And not just any top cop would have signed the approvals needed for this to go on. you just can’t teach this kind of patriotism or ethics – perhaps doling out a few RGU diplomas to those involved would be a suitable reward.

Officer Bob Lambert was especially vigilant; he had his own children, but fathered a child with a woman named Jacqui.  Oddly, she feels hard done by, and feels like she was ‘raped by the state.’  The Guardian has more on her story here http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2013/jun/24/undercover-police-spy-girlfriend-child

As ever, Private Eye has been on this story from its early days.  No doubt more accounts of heroics will be forthcoming; Old Susannah will watch in admiration, and report back.

Just a little reminder.

Do enjoy the summer sun, but wear sunscreen.  If you have children, don’t let them out for any length of time, cloudy or sunny, without a good child’s sun lotion.  Unless you want to damage their health that is.  Even a little sunburn for a child will be very dangerous and damaging.

Dogs need lots of water if you’re taking them on long walks, make sure you bring some water for them.  And please don’t wind up like the Edinburgh policeman a few years back who killed his dog.

He left it in the hot car.  Just for a moment.  It’s dead, and that’s really all you need to know.  Dogs die in hot cars – and in cars that don’t seem hot to you.  Dogs also get stolen.  If you wouldn’t want your dog dead or stolen, then don’t leave it alone.  Enjoy your summer with sense.

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