Lord McCluskey his recommendit
We shud regulate Scottish press
Iss his caused a richt ballyhoo
Fae Stranraer up tae Stromness
The press maun hae freedom
Tae tell us aa fit’s fit
Bit ower mony o oor tabloids
Jist print a load o shit
The SNP is noo thinkin
O publishin it’s ain paper
Mony fowk are nae in favour
O iss propaganda caper
The opeenion column o the P&J
His been caain fer democracy
Thoosans o fowk wull be laachin
Aboot their bliddy hypocrisy
Aa iss fae oor local paper
Faa’s bias tae Trump’s weel kent
Yet views fae Tripping up Trump
They widna pit intae print
“Traitors” bawled the “Evenin Express”
At the cooncillors faa voted no
Fin Trump’s application wis thrown oot
“EE” condemnation wisna slow
A paper’s voice maan be heard
As lang’s they play bi the rules
An nae be thocht o nation wide
As “The Laird o Menie’s Fules”
Bob Smith “The Poetry Mannie” 2013